


No one dares to cross the snow border

by Szparagi2002



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Being Lost, Cold Weather, Dream is a sadist and a masochist, Explicit Language, Family Angst, Family Dynamics, Family Issues, Fear of Death, Good Sibling Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Hunters & Hunting, Hypothermia, Separation Anxiety, Teen Angst, Winter, in this house we hate c!Dream, no beta we die like wilbur
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-22
Updated: 2021-02-21
Packaged: 2021-03-11 03:55:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 27,585
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28148718
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Szparagi2002/pseuds/Szparagi2002
Summary: It was cold. Really cold. He should have brought at least a jacket with him to a snow biome, something that wasn't just a damn t-shirt, but he didn’t really have time to do that, did he? He had to run, to escape them and survive.He could hear their steps behind him, the crunching of brunches under their feet was so goddamn loud. They didn’t need to be quiet, their prey already knew about them and their increasing blood lust.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 64





	1. You should run, boy

**Author's Note:**

> The action of this fanfiction takes place before the exile but after the November 16th.

It was cold. Really cold. He should have brought at least a jacket with him to a snow biome, something that wasn't just a damn t-shirt, but he didn’t really have time to do that, did he? He had to run, to escape them and survive.

He could hear their steps behind him, the crunching of brunches under their feet was so goddamn loud. They didn’t need to be quiet, their prey already knew about them and their increasing blood lust.

Hunters started slowly closing the distance between them, while the panicking boy was trying to run as fast as he could, but in the long run, they would eventually catch up to him. 

Tommy could hear the laughter behind him, _His_ laughter. The forest began to thin out, and now he could see the clearing covered somewhat in snow. The snow was a good sign, he was getting close to the potential safety. At least he hoped so.

His breathing was unsteady, now he could even see the puffs of hot air coming from his mouth. It was getting cold, but he couldn’t feel it yet, his body was on so much adrenaline, that he didn’t really feel anything else besides panic.

He had to run as far away as possible. He was being hunted for fun, and they would probably kill him the moment he stopped to even catch a breath. Now he didn’t hear the brunches being crushed, it was the snow that crunched under the hunters’ feet suggesting that they were getting closer and closer to him.

His situation wasn’t really the best. Yeah, he often was getting into trouble for his jokes, and sometimes he would be even beat up a little for what he had done, but they never really meant any real harm to him. Just some playful scuffle. But now? Now he was running to save his life, it wasn’t just a simple play of tag with friends, he was being hunted like a wild animal.

They had armour and weapons, knew how to hunt and their strength was in numbers. Tommy on the other hand was defenceless, didn’t really know anything about surviving or hunting in the wild and he was very alone and scared. With almost no chance of surviving on his own.

Who knows how long he could run like this, escaping the death from, what was once, a group of his best friends.

He screwed up big time, didn’t he? He never saw them being so angry, it was meant to be just a simple and innocent prank. Who knew they would get so furious with him. They even shot him with an arrow. He pulled it out, but his shoulder was still stinging with pain, despite the adrenaline in his veins. The open wound was making his red sleeve even redder than it was before.

Tommy hoped that the arrow wasn’t poisoned with anything, however, if it was, his chance of survival would get even slimmer than it was now.

He was now running through a very open and full of snow clearing, they could easily shoot him with an arrow, especially now when there were no trees in the way and he was slowed down by the massive amount of snow on the ground. He wouldn’t stand a chance. So why wouldn’t they take the deadly shot?

The blonde risked being slowed down even more and turned his head to look behind him, but the only thing he saw was his own footsteps left in the snow. Somehow the missing sight of the hunters was making him even more scared and nervous.

Was this a trap? Did he run into something they prepared for him? Would it hurt? There was no way they would just let him go after all of that, was it? He was definitely done for.

The panic was getting the better of him, but he managed to make himself slow down, even if it was for a little bit. He should save some energy, just in case if it was, in fact, a trap and he had to run again. He was fighting to breathe normally, after such a distance he had to run for.

Eyes wide with fear were looking for any sign that would mean that he was being chased again, every sound was making him jump in fear as if someone would throw themself at him with a knife to cut his throat. Even if the danger was nowhere to be seen, he couldn’t feel safe. Not yet.

‘’ _Oh Tommyyyyy_ ~’’, he could swear that at this moment his heart stopped beating for a second upon hearing Dream’s taunting voice coming from who knows where. The bastard’s voice was muffled by the wind and snow, preventing Tommy from knowing where his friends (could he even call them that anymore?) were hiding.

The blonde turned around a few times trying to spot the neon green hoodie of his persecutor but to no avail. Even though Tommy was standing in the centre of a clearing, around him were a lot of hills with brushwood, blocking off the chance to see any danger coming. They could jump at him any second and surround him. If that happened, there was no chance he could make it out alive.

‘’Don’t you think that it’s not nice to run off like that, Tommy?’’, a wheezed laughter could be heard from all directions at once, making the boy shiver. Maybe it was just the surrounding coldness or the feeling of dread, but his whole body was shaking as if he was just a leaf being tossed by the cold antarctic wind.

‘’F-fuck off dickhead! You shot me with an arrow you bitch!’’, Tommy wishes he didn’t sound so scared. Where did all of his teenage confidence go when he needed it the most?

‘’Oh Tommy, that wasn’t me who shot you. Don’t you remember who was holding the crossbow?’’, he could feel smug on Dreams’ face as the man was talking to him. Tommy wasn’t going to get tricked by words coming from that filthy green mouth. Not again.

‘’You really don’t remember, huh? I must admit, you looked quite shocked there, but I didn’t think that you would blank out this memory. Especially since it happened not so long ago.’’, his voice was filled with mocking sadness and pretended shock, making Tommy angrier than anything else.

‘’The fuck are you even talking about?! You hold the fucking crossbow right in front of my face! It was Tubbo that pulled me back before you could fucking kill me!’’, he shouted into the snowy void, hoping to see anything that could help him, but there was nothing. Just pure whiteness.

‘’What do you mean Tommy? Tubbo was the one holding the crossbow’’, the words pierced right through his head, making him only slightly whimper in response. That couldn’t be true. Tubbo was his friend. His best friend!

‘’Stop lying to me! The only thing you do is lie and manipulate people! Why would I trust you now when the only thing you did was hurt me and my friends?!’’, his shallow breathing was getting faster and faster, he was almost hyperventilating from all the stress his body was enduring.

This time there was no response. Just constant swooshing of the cold wind could be heard.

Tommy started turning around once again, but there was no one. If they were here, they would probably still be hidden. but he had to make sure that no one was sneaking behind him, while he was being distracted by Dream and his lies.

He had to be lying, right? There was no way that Tubbo was the one who shot him. He would never… of course, Tubbo would never shoot him! Why would he even think like that, doubting his best friend! Dream was just getting into his head that’s all!

The only logical explanation of why he couldn’t remember Tubbo running with him from L’manburg was probably because of the shock from getting shot. That must be it! But if that was the case… Where was Tubbo?

Tommy was sure that if they had run together, he wouldn’t lose Tubbo. Did Tubbo lose him by any chance? Maybe he got distracted by something like he often used to do that? If so, why hadn’t he screamed at any point that Tommy was running too fast? Something in his story wasn’t right, but there was no way in hell that he would trust Dream’s words.

Minutes that passed in silence felt like hours, the constant cold was getting worse and worse, making his entire body shake in what felt almost like a convulsion. He had to find his older brother before the hunters got bored with him. Otherwise, he would end up dead, his body left in the snow, forgotten by everyone.

Tommy wasn’t going to let that happen to him. He was stronger than they thought. His will was stronger than anyone that ever met him, plus he was a very stubborn teenager. If someone could find Technoblade and not get killed by him, it would be Tommy. Hopefully.

‘’What do you want with me Dream?!’’, he shouted hoping for an answer, but what he heard did not make him any calmer.

‘’ _Shoot to kill boys_ ’’

_Run_ , _run,_ **_run_ **, it sounded like his whole body, every cell was screaming at him. Tommy didn’t wait to hear if they actually started shooting in his direction, he listened to his instincts and started running, possibly even faster than before.

He must have got some luck left because most of the arrows missed him and hit the snow. Most of them. One hit him in the arm causing his already wounded shoulder to hurt even more because of the impact. The other hit him in the knee hem making him fall onto his knees. This time Tommy did not attempt to hold back and screamed in pain, scaring the nearest birds, which flew away in panic.

Still being on his knees, Tommy was trying to stand back up but someone kicked him in the back, making him fall flat on the snow. The arrow in the arm also hit the snow-covered ground, making the boy grunt in pain at the sudden feeling of pain.

He felt someone leaning over him, their head close to his. Then the boy felt the warm air brushing over his ear, which made him shiver a little more.

‘’Where will you run now, raccoon boy?’’, if his veins were pumping blood in him before, now everything was frozen.

Tommy’s eyes began to water at the thought of Dream having his fun with him. Everyone knew that it’s better to not make Dream mad. Everyone remembered the wars they had with him. The way he hurt them couldn’t be described as humane. Dream was a psychopath and a sadist, and it was better to stay out of his way if you wanted to ever experience peaceful sleep and not wake up with nightmares.

They all remembered the final control room.

‘’D-dream, please… I-I’m very sorry, please!’’ a shaky breath escaped the begging boy who still lied on the cold snow. ‘’I swear that I will behave! N-no more… no more pranks and jokes, just p-please… let me go…’’

Tommy could see how the snow under him started turning from pale white to dark red. He was bleeding too much. That wasn’t a good sign. But now he had other problems to worry about. Bleeding out could wait.

A soft chuckle escaped the man’s mouth as if Tommy had said a joke and not begged him to be spared.

‘’You still don’t understand, do you? As long as I am here, you won’t be coming back to cause more chaos, Tommy. This is **my** village, those are **my** people that I have to protect **and you are not one of them anymore** ’’, his words were like a shattered mirror and every piece of that glass was now falling on Tommy. Millions of invisible cuts were left on his body.

‘’W-what do you mean?’’, his voice was shaking, but he didn’t care what they thought of him. The last remains of his pride were long gone. He was now, just a scared little kid, on the mercy of a living monster that still stood over him making him unable to move or run with just a gaze.

‘’I mean that you can’t come back to L’manberg anymore Tommy’’

‘’B-but it’s my home! These are my friends! You can’t do that Dream!’’, another shaky breath left the boy, who tried getting up. Yet again a kick in his back send him once more onto the cold ground making him squirm from all the pain.

‘’I tell you what, we can have a deal that would satisfy us both, what do you say old friend?’’, it didn’t really feel as if Tommy even had a say in this matter, but he guessed that everything was better than death.

‘’What… what do you want?’’, Dream was now standing in front of him, leaning over so close, that Tommy could see his own reflection in the porcelain mask. He looked like shit. Pale skin on his face could be mistaken with the snow. At least the part of snow that wasn’t stained with his blood. The sweat on his face was almost frozen, which made him look as if he also had some sort of a mask.

He hated that thing. Because of that mask, you could never guess what Dream was thinking, or how he would react. There was no preparation for the moment you crossed the line. You never knew when to stop and when to prepare for a strike coming from Dream. He was like a venomous snake, always ready to bite and poison his enemies.

But now, Tommy was 100% sure that he had crossed every line Dream ever had. Whatever that bastard had planned for him couldn’t be good. If he even managed to stay alive, he would call it a success. After all, a deal with the devil had to have some consequences.

‘’It’s very simple. You see, I want a nation that can live peacefully, with no wars or conflicts, but your _stupid_ brother had other plans-’’

‘’Wilbur just wanted freedom! He wasn’t stupid and you know that!’’, Tommy almost screamed at the man in a green hoodie.

No one would insult his brother. Not on his watch. Even if it would cost him his tongue, Tommy would always support his big brother. They always had each other’s backs, even when Wilbur was losing his mind, Tommy would never leave his side. He believed that Wilbur could change, that they did not need to blow up everything that they worked so hard on.

He believed so strongly that Wilbur wasn’t a lost cause, that when he saw how their father pierced the sword through his chest, he couldn’t believe his own eyes. No one expected that, not even the great and powerful Technoblade could predict that the fall of their beloved brother would be caused by the hands of their father. After that day Tommy got much quieter.

Maybe if he saw earlier how much Wilbur has changed, how much his mental stability was in shambles, his brother wouldn’t be now a ghost, wandering over a crater of a once great nation, not remembering his friends and family.

But it was too late for anything. Now they could only look and talk with the wraith of what was once Wilbur.

‘’ **Do not** interrupt me Tommy’’, a silent threat in his voice was enough to silence the boy. Tommy knew that he couldn’t help Wilbur while also being dead. He had to stand the insults that were aimed at one of his family members. It wasn’t an easy task, but he had to stay silent for now.

‘’As I was saying... your brother, which if I remember correctly, is now dead because of his stupid decision to stand in _my_ way, isn’t he?. He threatened my peace, _our_ peace, for just some useless land’’, Dream stopped leaning over him, took a few steps back as if he tried to admire how weak and frail Tommy was right now. After what felt like an eternity lying under his porcelain gaze, the man started walking from place to place repeatedly and Tommy could only watch his movements, as he himself was still lying in the cold snow.

It was very much possible that if he even tried getting up, he would be kicked once again to the ground. Dream was not one of the most patient people in the world and Tommy didn’t really feel like testing how much patience his enemy had left for him. Maybe he was stupid and careless, but not to that extent.

‘’As much as I value our friendship, I cannot let you go that easily. After all, you did so much damage to L’manberg and your friends, that it would be considered a sin to let you go without a _punishment_ ’’, he was now gesturing with his hands as if he was getting excited even thinking about this part. Tommy, on the contrary, was terrified. His blue eyes once again were wide with fear, his body tensed, ready to run for his life, even if he subconsciously knew it was a pointless effort.

‘’You were t-telling me about some sort of a deal before, right? What was that all about?’’, he laughed a little trying to ease the tense atmosphere. He was stalling. One of the few things that Tommy had learned from Technoblade and considered it something worth remembering. Now, if he could manage to find a soft spot in Dream’s potentially existing heart, maybe he even had a chance to live for another day. Hopefully, the man hidden behind the mask had some emotions that were not based on complete sadism and blood lust.

Dream stopped in his tracks, which only unsettled Tommy more, rather than calming him down. The porcelain mask was now facing him directly. That damn smile gave him shivers every time he looked at it. It was so emotionless despite the smile carved in it.

‘’You know what? Fine, I can tell you about our little deal, but don’t even think for a second, that the punishment will suddenly disappear, just because you’re stalling Tommy. I know your brothers and their behaviours, you’re not so different from them, you know?’’, the man chuckled a little, more to himself, rather than to Tommy.

The boy swallowed nervously, feeling nausea coming. He couldn’t afford to make himself more worn out by vomiting. He was already badly hurt, wounds were still bleeding, a little less than before, yes, but it still wasn’t good, that he was losing his vital fluids.

‘’Our deal would be very simple - I will not kill you as long as you won’t get close to L’manberg. It’s very easy, isn’t it?’’, his voice was filled with a sickening sweetness, which didn’t really help Tommy with stopping his stomach contents from leaving his body.

Dream got close to him again and put one of his hands on Tommy’s cheek hard enough to make the boy look straight at the mask.

‘’Before you ask about the catch, there is none. You’re staying out of my way and I stay out of yours. As I said before, very simple’’

The next sentence that left the man’s mouth was just a whisper, which could be only heard by Tommy, because of all the wind that was blowing around them.

‘’But if I ever see you again in L’manberg, you can be sure that you won’t leave it out alive. I will have my fun with you sooner or later, you annoying brat’’, the last part of his sentence couldn’t be considered a whisper anymore, but a hiss. Snake-like hiss.

If Tommy was breathing somewhat normally before, now it was shallow and fast. If he wouldn’t stop or slow down, he was sure to start hyperventilating. The stalling part was over and now he was at mercy of someone who slaughtered hundreds, if not thousands of people. To dream it didn’t matter if they were innocent or not, he craved blood and he had to somehow satisfy his desires.

‘’Do we have a deal Tommy?’’, the child simply nodded. He feared that his own voice wouldn’t leave his mouth if he even tried to talk.

Dream lightly patted his cheek, you could say it was almost sympathetic if it wasn’t for the upcoming words that left his mouth.

‘’Hold him down’’

Before Tommy could even react, four pairs of hands were pinning him to the ground. Each pair on each one of his limbs. He couldn’t move. He couldn’t run. Not anymore. They finally caught him and now he could only follow Dream with his eyes, as the man made his way to stand behind him. If he was doing something, Tommy couldn’t see what it was. Dream was now outside of his eyesight.

If it wasn’t for the wind, there wouldn’t be any sounds. Everyone was quiet, waiting for another order. Tommy was shocked that no one reacted at how loud his heart was. It was impossible that he was the only one hearing the loud and fast thumps. He couldn’t concentrate and think because of the deafening beating that his own heart was making, how could they not hear it?

Tommy felt that the shaft of an arrow stuck in his knee hem was being held by someone, which could only be Dream, as the rest of his group was in process of holding him to the ground. His body tensed in panic, while he tried to somehow prepare himself for the pain that was meant to come. But nothing could prepare him for the agonizing pain coming from his leg when the arrow was being brutally wrenched out of it. Tommy wasn’t sure if he was screaming or not, at this point he wasn’t even sure if he was really conscious. Everything was so loud, the beating of his heart, the buzzing in his ears, the blowing wind. His head was about to explode and all he could do was lie there and do nothing.

He didn’t react when the hands stopped holding him down, his entire body was numb. If someone had said something to him, he did not register it, his mind was full of a high-pitched screech that didn’t seem to die down with time. His vision was blurred by the tears streaming down his eyes, nothing made sense to him anymore. There were too many stimuli around for his body to comprehend all of them, making Tommy nothing more than a ragdoll. If Dream had more plans for torture, he would probably not even notice it, he was too overwhelmed to feel, hear or think anymore.

The masked man looked down on the child lying in red-stained snow, drops of blood dripping from the drawn arrow in his hand were staining the pure snow around him. Tommy’s body was constantly tensing and relaxing, it looked almost like a convulsion of someone who was dying, but Dream knew better. It wasn’t the first time he had to state someone’s else’s condition, you could say that he was an expert at it. The child wouldn’t die from the injuries, even if they looked rather serious, it definitely will be the cold that takes his young life.

It didn’t really matter to him if Tommy survived or not. As long as he wasn’t standing in his way the child could live, even if Dream wanted to have more fun with him, he was going to keep his part of the deal. After all, he was a man of his word. He might be a psychopath and a sadist, but he wanted his word to have some meaning, he wasn’t going to make some empty promises. A god like him should be feared, but his followers should also know that they can rely on him and trust his words. He’s not a complete monster… right?

The first one to say something was Bad, which didn’t really surprise Dream. His friend was known to have a soft heart. Even if Tommy was often making him mad with his cursing, the demon liked the companion of blonde, the two often joked and battled together despite being most of the time on the opposite sides of the conflicts. Dream wondered how much time would it take before Bad would forget about the boy.

‘’We’re not going to leave him like that, right? He’s just a kid Dream!’’, his voice was filled with worry, but there was also a hint of desperation that Dream heard. Desperation always led to Conflict. Conflict led to rebellion and rebellion always led to unnecessary bloodshed of his close ones. If he kills the desperation fast enough there shouldn’t be any problems.

‘’Leave him. He won’t survive the night here’’, as Dream said those words, he turned around and started walking into the direction of the forest they had come from in the beginning. The rest of the group looked at the beaten-up child lying in a puddle of his own blood. They didn’t move.

When Dream didn’t hear any footsteps behind him he turned around to see his friends leaving some of their stuff next to the boy. Some food, a jacket, even an iron sword could be found in a little pile they gathered. He didn’t understand why his friends were so fond of something so annoying. Maybe he wasn’t meant to understand. Maybe it was a human thing to do. Kindness was something very foreign to him even after all these years of being alongside other people.

‘’He should at least have a chance, you know?’’, Bad’s words snapped Dream back to reality.

His friends were not happy that they had to leave Tommy alone in the wilderness, he clearly saw that, but a deal was a deal and they knew it. Even if they wanted to take him back to L’manberg, Dream would kill him as soon as he stepped into its territory, regardless of the protests of his friends. He would do it for their own good, even if they didn’t understand that fully. He wanted them safe and the chaos that Tommy was making could hurt everyone.

‘’Even if he does survive, Technoblade will get rid of our little problem for us. After all, who would want a traitor under their roof?’’, he once again started making his way back home, but this time he didn’t wait for his friends. If they wanted to come back in one piece they would go with him. Being alone at night was still dangerous even with as good equipment as they had on them.

Dream knew that none of them wanted to go back alone, but hearing the footsteps behind him still made him feel a little less anxious about his decisions. If they truly hated him and his choices they wouldn’t follow him, even if it meant they could die at night. Yet, there they were, sad, guilt written on their faces, but they were at his side. That was what really mattered to him.

The sounds of the walking group were long gone when Tommy was finally able to think a coherent thought. He still was lying in the cold snow, his wounds were still bleeding, but at least he was alive. A success.

_Get up._

Tommy was looking straight ahead at the horizon, his head still filled with high-pitched screeching. It was much quieter than before, but still there, making his headache more painful. He finally noticed that he wasn’t being held down any more, but he didn’t even try getting up. He was too tired, every muscle in his body hurt and he just wanted to fall asleep right then and there. He knew he couldn’t do that just yet. He would die and all this pain that he had endured would be in vain. 

_You have to get up_.

If Tommy could see the unmasked faces when they were leaving him some equipment, he would notice that regret and shame filled them to the brims, but since his eyes were focused on the sun, which started leaning towards the west, he didn’t even have a chance to look at the departing group.

_You need to get up Tommy._

If he focused enough on one thing, like the setting sun, his head didn’t hurt that much. He still was feeling like complete shit, but at least now he was able to think. He might be just hallucinating from all this pain and extreme stress, but he could swear that in his head there wasn’t only his own voice. There were hundreds if not thousands of other voices. They were screaming at him. It still wasn’t louder than the awful screech in his head, but he was able to make sense of what they were trying to say.

_Get up._ **_It’s not your time yet._ ** _Get up. Get up. Get up. Get up. Get up._ **_You have to get up Tommy._ ** _Get up. Get up. Get up. Get up. Get up. Get up._ **_You are stronger than this._ ** _Get up. Get up. Get up. Get up._ **_He needs you._ ** _Get up. Get up. Get up. Get up._ **_You must get up._ ** _Get up. Get up. Get up. Get up._ **_You can do this._ ** _Get up. Get up. Get up. Get up. Get up. Get up. Get up._

The screams got worse with each passing minute. They got louder and louder, and louder. Tommy was now holding his head in hope that all of those cries would just simply disappear. But they didn’t. He didn’t know how much time had passed before the voices calmed down enough for him to even be able to open his eyes. If the only thing that would make the voices quiet was him getting up, he would risk being in bigger pain than now.

He didn’t want to hear the voices ever again.

His whole body was in pain, but somehow he managed to sit up. He saw the things left for him stacked in the pile. That couldn’t be Dream, he wouldn’t help Tommy after all of this. He suspected that it was Bad’s idea. They were the closest from Dream’s group. He made a mental note that If he ever would meet Bad again, he had to thank him for all of this. His chance of surviving the night was a little higher with all of this stuff.

He had to get up before the sun would be completely gone. Monsters wouldn’t wait for him just because he was a weak kid. They would just see easy prey waiting to be devoured. He had to reach Technoblade’s base. He knew that his older brother would help him. Tommy just hoped that Techno shared the same opinion as him in that matter.


	2. There is a long way ahead for you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If you asked anyone what their favourite memory was, they would probably say something alongside the lines of an exotic vacation, birthday party with a group of friends or a family trip into the woods. However, if you asked Tommy the same question, his answer would probably shock you. After all, ‘’the day my dad left us’’ doesn’t really sound like a happy memory, right? But to him it means everything. On that specific day, his whole family was together for the last time. There were no wars or conflicts to win, they were just a happy family, having a nice day with each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How easy it is to see that I have unresolved daddy issues? lmao

If you asked anyone what their favourite memory was, they would probably say something alongside the lines of an exotic vacation, birthday party with a group of friends or a family trip into the woods. However, if you asked Tommy the same question, his answer would probably shock you. After all, ‘’the day my dad left us’’ doesn’t really sound like a happy memory, right? But to him it means everything. On that specific day, his whole family was together for the last time. There were no wars or conflicts to win, they were just a happy family, having a nice day with each other.

Everyone was very much alive and healthy back then. Now one of the brothers is a wandering ghost with a complete memory loss, the youngest one is badly hurt crossing the antarctic deserts trying to reach the eldest brother. ‘’What about him?’’ you might ask. Well, no one really knows for sure where he is. After the wither ‘’incident’’ every trace of him was gone, it looked like he had disappeared into thin air. The only scraps of information about his whereabouts were that he was hiding in the snow biome, in the middle of an arctic desert, far from any bigger villages. I know, I know, not the most helpful information in the world, but that’s all the information people could get from Phil. He wasn’t going to say where Techno was hiding. Especially not when there were people ready to kill him for letting two withers free in the middle of L’manberg (or whatever was left from it). There was no way he would lose the trust his son had in him.

Those scraps didn’t really narrow the field of searching that much, but it was better than nothing. Every bit of information could help Tommy with finding his base. Who knows how good it was hidden? He could be as well hiding under the ice in the middle of some frozen lake or maybe he built his base on the highest mountain and without the special equipment, you would never get to the very top? Everything is possible with Techno, he may be a mastermind of war strategy, but it doesn’t mean that this man is incapable of building a very well hidden and strongly protected base.

Their father took care of teaching his eldest sons how to be independent, what they should do to survive on their own and how to build a strong and safe base. Maybe if he had waited a little longer before leaving in his ‘’very important business matters’’, as he liked to say, Tommy would have a bigger chance of surviving on his own now. He knew that complaining about the past wouldn’t help him in his current situation, but sometimes he wished that his dad would pay more attention to him.

After their father left, Tommy and Wilbur were getting ready to visit the Dreamlands, a new nation that they have heard of. The vision of a new place and people was very tempting for the adventure starved boys. Who knew what could wait for them there? Techno, despite almost desperate persuading from the younger two, decided to stay in the house and wait for the return of their father. It wasn’t very shocking that the favourite son would stay at home like a loyal dog, waiting for the day the owner comes back.

No matter how much Phil tried his best at not giving it away, there was clear favouritism in their family. Techno was always the smartest, the fastest, the most skilled of the three of them. He was always the one getting the most compliments and praises. Wil was clearly used to it after so many years, it hasn’t really bothered him that much from the look of it, but Tommy never came to terms with the fact that their father had a favourite son. He didn’t show it to the rest of the family, but it hurt him deeply. Every time Techno did something Tommy tried doing the same, but in most cases he failed miserably, making a huge mess in the process.

Phil wasn’t the biggest fan of a mess, but whenever he caught Tommy doing something that Techno did earlier, he would help his youngest son. Even if it meant there would be A LOT of cleaning afterwards. He might not have been the best father Tommy could have wished for, but he was always there to help their sons with whatever they have been struggling at the moment.  ~~ Even if he was sometimes late. ~~

Sometimes Phil would find Tommy behind the house, with his failed project on the ground, normally smashed to pieces for not being good enough or working differently than it was supposed to. Tommy would often cry over it before throwing it all away, but whenever Phil found him, he tried covering the tears. He was a man after all! Big men like him never cried! It didn’t matter that he was five, ten or fourteen at the time, he was a big and a strong man. But even such a big man like him would never reject a good hug from his dad. He liked them, the warmth and calm that flowed over him from his dad’s hugs were unmatched to anything else.

After he calmed down a little, his dad would ask if everything was okay and if he needed any help with anything. If it would be anyone else asking, Tommy’s pride wouldn’t let him say that he needed help, but a chance to spend some time with his dad? He wouldn’t miss it for the world. On days like these, they would spend their time working on whatever was malfunctioning. In most cases, they just tried using a lot of glue and tape and prayed that it would work, but usually, their little creations failed to work again. Despite the results of their struggle, they often had a lot of laughs along the way and there were no tears anymore, so for Phil and Tommy, it was a time well spent.

If Phil knew that the twins happened to observe them a few times through a window, trying to repair whatever was left of Tommy’s project, he kept that to himself and never told his youngest son. He knew that the kid would be really embarrassed if he knew that his brothers found out about him being ‘’weak’’. He just hoped that his son would eventually notice that his brothers were also there for him as much as he was for them.

After spending most of the daytime in the backyard, they would get back to the house, make some hot chocolate and tea for themselves and twins, and simply sit around the table in the kitchen, talking and laughing. Wilbur was usually bragging over how much townspeople loved his music and how much friends he was gaining on a daily basis. Techno then would proceed to let the whole family know that at this point Wil should be close friends with the entire village. Of course he was writing down how much people Wilbur claimed to befriend. It was his thing to be the smartest and most logical of them all.

But even those quick moments of jealousy couldn’t make Tommy sad or grumpy while sitting and talking with his family. He and Phil would then start talking, before the twins started arguing for real, about how much fun they had (this part was mostly being narrated by Tommy), while their dad tried explaining what exactly they did for the whole day. Their stories combined would make both twins laugh at some point, ending their rising argument.

Phil never, at any moment, mentioned Tommy crying, which made him genuinely happy. He knew that Wilbur and Techno would make fun of him for something like that. He never saw them crying so they probably never did it. It made perfect sense in his head! His big brothers were too strong for something so childish like crying. It was rare to even see them being sad. They would often get angry while getting into arguments with each other or Tommy and then yell a lot, but they were almost never sad. He would never admit to any of them that he cried over something so simple like an automatic crossbow that wouldn’t shoot for more than half a meter.

Whenever his dad found him over a failed project of his, after spending time with the whole family, he would wait until the evening, when the twins went into their room, and then he would take a very old and shabby book of his from the top shelf on the bookshelf in the living room. That was the only one shelf they were forbidden from taking the books from.

There was only one situation where Tommy heard that Techno was getting scolded (rather angrily, which shocked him even more). It turned out that Techno took one of the forbidden books and was reading them in secret. Phil wasn’t happy about that. The number one son got grounded for a week, but besides that, the topic of the books was never mentioned again by Phil. Wilbur tried getting Techno to share what was inside the books, but whenever the teen was mentioning them, Techno was only getting tense while also getting less and less talkative with each mention of them. It was weird even for him to be this quiet, so Wilbur stopped asking.

Tommy wasn’t that curious about the forbidden books, the only one he cared about would always be brought to him by his dad. Whenever he heard two knocks on his door, he knew who to expect. He always saw the head of his dad, with a soft smile on his face, peeking through the door gap to see if he was asleep. Tommy was never asleep on those nights, it was like a part of their little tradition. Phil upon seeing his son wide awake would enter the room and sit on the edge of the bed with a book in his hands.

His dad often said that this was also his favourite book when he was Tommy’s age, that’s why he was so happy whenever his son was getting excited about the tales. No matter how many times his dad would bring the book with him to his room, Tommy always asked if he wasn’t too old for these stories, even if in secret he adored every single one of them, but his dad would say the same thing, no matter how many times he asked the same question.

‘’No one is too old for a good bedtime story, mate’’, he would laugh at his son softly, ruffle his blond hair a little and then he would start reading one of Tommy’s favourite stories until the boy fell asleep.

In every book Phil had read him to sleep, the parents always loved every sibling the same, no one was loved more than the other. If it was so common in stories then why did their dad couldn’t do the same? Tommy knew that these tales were fiction, but his dad always said that in every story there was a grain of truth. Were they simply not enough? Was Techno really that good at everything or did he and Wil were just that bad? Tommy didn’t really realize until his late teen years how much Wilbur was affected by all of this. Only when his older brother snapped under the pressure of getting his nation back, he saw how both of them were hurt from lack of their father’s love.

It wasn’t too late for Tommy, but Wilbur lost his way a long time ago. Everything was taken away from him - his own nation banished him after all the hard work he put into establishing its independence, his friends could be possible traitors, it wouldn’t even be the first time it happened. Tubbo was their mole on Schlatt, but it didn’t mean that he couldn’t be also spying on them. Dream may have provided him with the TNT, but that didn’t mean that he could be trusted. The presence of their oldest brother definitely wasn’t helping with his spiralling mental health, it was probably making it even worse than it already was.

The day finally came. Wilbur was standing in front of the button, for him, all hope for finishing his symphony was gone. L’manberg anthem carved on the cold stone walls of the room was reminding him of what he had lost so far. Maybe there was a chance of getting his nation back? Wilbur couldn’t lie anymore, not even to himself. There was no L’manberg anymore. If he pressed the button there would be no coming back. Even if he survived the explosions he was sure that everyone would hate him for what he was about to do. They probably already hated him anyway. Was there anything left to lose?

He was one press of the button from ending it all. There was a nervous smile on his face, one that you would find on someone who tries to ask their crush on a date, not on someone who wants to blow up their own country. There was just one small problem that wasn’t included in his plan. Wilbur didn’t really predict the details of his death, he hoped for a quick release in the explosion, or that someone from his friends would kill him for what he did. That’s why he was so shocked when he saw his father standing there with a disappointed look on his face.  ~~ He was finally here to help his struggling son. ~~

The nervous smile was now gone, Wilbur was smiling softly at Phil.  ~~ Just like his dad used to smile at him ~~ ~~.~~ Dad was finally here, everything would be alright. How couldn’t it be? Now Phil could finally see his greatest symphony yet, he would be finally proud of his son. 

After the words of the traitor from the past left his mouth and the button was pressed, the rest happened so quickly. The quake, the soft wings around him, his dad hugging him. There was so much happening that it didn’t even hurt when the cold sword went through his chest. He was safely held by Phil who was rubbing little calming circles with his finger on Wilbur’s back. Was dad crying? He couldn’t tell, his vision was too blurry. Was  _ he  _ crying? He really couldn’t tell, he didn’t really feel anything besides his father’s warm hug. Before his mind slipped away completely he heard a whisper between the shaky sobs.

_ ‘’You’re my son…’’ _

After Philza killed Wilbur in front of everyone, Tommy clearly saw how much his father was hurt by that. The usual bright, full of life eyes were now gloomy and dark as if covered with some sort of mist. They were also almost constantly red from the amount of tears.

The boy wondered how much his father had cried, the guilt must have been devouring him from the inside, taking away every good thing that Tommy could remember about his father. It wasn’t like he really had a choice, his son was too far gone. Letting him live would only hurt more people, he had to do it, he was an angel of death, after all. These poor excuses were unfortunately not enough to stop the pain Phil felt every hour, every minute,  _ every second _ of each passing day. The winged man just hoped that he would never have to take the life of his son again.

In a short time which the two of them have spent together, Tommy for the first time in his life saw his father with bags under his eyes. From their entire family, it was always their dad that had the best sleep schedule, he never seemed to be tired, always so full of energy and love for his sons. It was probably all the magic of his morning coffee, but still. He would always wake up first and make breakfast for everyone, enjoying every second of their time spent together, chuckling at how his sons always seemed tired no matter how much sleep they had.

Now he almost couldn’t recognize his own father. Phil was now a shell of his former self. It was worse than looking at the ghost of his own brother who couldn’t recognize either of them. The first time they saw the entity, Tommy was giving a tour of what was left after the explosions. He hoped that his dad would feel a little better after the walk in the fresh air. Tommy was very excited to show Phil his house. He was very proud of how it came out! He wasn’t the best builder of the family, but he always tried his best!

But there they saw it. Standing (or rather floating?) in front of his house. It looked very confused and lost.

Tommy was dumbfounded and assumed his dad would be shocked like him, or that he would scream and cry, but he simply walked over to the ghost. Phil behaved like it wasn’t the first time he saw someone once alive turn into a ghost. When his dad was close enough to the entity, he put his hand on its shoulder to get the attention of the spirit. Tommy expected that the hand would go right through its shoulder, but it didn’t. 

He remembers every goddamn detail of that day. The blonde is pretty sure that it will be one of those days he will remember for the rest of his life. The ghost was now facing them while having a big and bloody open wound on its chest, the yellow sweater and a beanie on its head were just as transparent as the rest of the ghost. Tommy’s house could be clearly seen right through the spirit. The sight made him nauseous.

Philza took a deep breath before talking to his deceased son. The first thing he asked was if he remembered anything. They learned that it knew only their own name. Nothing more than that. He didn’t remember Phil or Tommy or what he was doing outside his house. He also didn’t remember anything about the way he acted alive, what he had done. Tommy made sure to dump onto the ghost every bad thing he had done while being alive, that he could remember at the moment, before breaking down to tears in front of the ghost and their dad. 

_ Now _ Phil was shocked.

The presence of the ghost was too much for a teenager that had fought countless wars by his brother's side. He saw how Wilbur was slowly going crazy over time, how he was losing himself, he didn’t need to see what was left of his brother. He didn’t need to see something that didn’t even seem to remember him.

The boy started running, he wasn’t sure where he was running to, but he knew he had to get away from the ghost. He didn’t want to acknowledge the fact that Wilbur is really dead and the only thing that’s left is his ghost. Ignoring his father’s screams, he threw an ender pearl as far as he could, teleporting far enough to not get caught quickly. He couldn’t face anyone in his current state. Not the ghost, not his dad, not anyone. He needed to be somewhere safe and quiet, somewhere where no one will find him before he will be ready to talk.

Tommy wasn’t even sure when he started knocking on Bad’s door, but the demon wasn’t asking any questions upon seeing the boy in such a state. Red eyes from crying, shaky breath from running (and probably also from all the sobbing along the way). He simply opened the door a little wider, just enough for Tommy to slide into his house. Bad then sat him down at the table, gave him tea and simply waited until the blonde was calm enough to talk. It was clear that Bad was worried about his friend, but Tommy knew that the demon wouldn’t pry into what happened.

The man stated a long time ago that if anything bad happened, he didn’t need to hear anything if it was going to make Tommy more uncomfortable or sadder than he already was. He just wanted Tommy to know that he was safe here. Of course, they could talk whenever Tommy was ready, but it wasn’t an obligation.

The silence between them wasn’t awkward at all, it was rather calming. He finally felt safe.

The blonde wasn’t sure how much time had passed since he went into his friend’s house, but now he was much calmer. He hesitantly tried to explain why he was running, why he was crying and how they saw Wilbur (or whatever was left from him). Tommy also questioned the behaviour of his dad, it didn’t make any sense to him at all.

When he was done explaining, he found himself crying again, but this time seeing him in this state, Bad simply got up and hugged him. Tommy gave into his friend’s effort to calm him down, crying into Bad’s sleeve. It wasn’t as warm and calming as his father’s hug, but Tommy wasn’t going to complain. He was definitely in need of another person at the moment. The only sound in the house beside the clock ticking steadily in the background was Tommy’s quiet sobbing.

The boy finally started mourning his dead brother.

Even if Phil was the one that took Wilbur’s life, Tommy knew that he couldn’t hold any grudges for his dad. After all, they both lost someone important. Tommy’s brother was gone, but so was Phil’s son. They both mourned the same person, but their grief was very much different.

Bad calmly told him that Phil could be in shock. That would explain his weird (normal?) behaviour. After all, you don’t see on a daily basis a ghost of your child that you had to murder. It would actually explain a lot. His dad even touched the ghost’s arm, there was no way that he knew that his hand wouldn’t go through the ghost.

They talked a lot about Phil, Wilbur and even a bit about Tommy. The time was passing quickly, it was clearly getting dark outside, even with the street lights on the road leading to Bad’s home. Tommy knew that he should leave, even if his friend didn’t make any remarks regarding his stay. He didn’t show it often, but his dad taught him some manners.

He thanked Bad for everything, hugging him a little tighter than previously. They didn’t need any special words to understand the meaning of that gesture. Both of them knew what the hug meant. The demon simply smiled warmly at him, before letting the boy go. Tommy thanked him again, who knows how many times today he had said that, before leaving Bad’s house. He had to find his dad. They needed to talk.

He found Phil in the ruins of the room that Wilbur was in his last moments. He sat down on the ground next to his dad without saying anything. Tommy just simply hugged his dad, he was pretty sure that Phil needed more closure now than he ever would. He felt his dad’s tears dropping onto his arms.

The blonde found himself being hugged back by his dad, tears still spilling. Who knows how long they sat on the cold stone floor before Tommy started talking. He wanted his dad to know that he was there for him, just like when Phil was always there for him. He wanted to say much more, but the words were stuck in his throat. The tears left his eyes for the third time today, but this time he didn’t hide them from Phil.

After the hugging session was done, they finally talked heart to heart, like a mourner to a mourner, like a father to a son and like a son to a father. That night a lot of tears were shed, but thankfully the heavy rain drowned their cries and sobs from any prying ears. It always seemed to rain when the world was drowning everyone in despair and sadness, but this time Tommy was glad for it.

Tommy really preferred the snow over the rain. It never snowed when something bad happened, it always meant fun times, playing with his family, starting  ~~ bloody ~~ snowball wars with Techno and Wilbur, while Phil was making them hot chocolate at home for when they got back, wet and cold from all the play in the snow outside. 

The snow now reminded him of the last happy memory he had with his whole family. It also snowed that day. He then wasn’t betrayed by both his brothers, Wilbur wasn’t dead, their dad was still with them and the biggest worry of his was who would wash the dishes after dinner or whose turn was to do the laundry. Their life was so peaceful then. 

How could everything go wrong so quickly? How could they have gotten so far apart? They were the sons of Philza Minecraft, the unstoppable trio that together was able to achieve everything! What was left of them now? A ghost, a teenager with trust issues and an anarchist that destroyed the home of the youngest of them.

Was there even a chance of them being a family once again? Or maybe the scars they gave each other were too deep and too painful for them to reconnect? No matter what happened in the past Tommy hoped that he and Techno had a chance to be a family once again. They both needed it.

Tommy always had the most hope of all of them. He didn’t lose it like Wilbur while they were fighting for their nation, he also didn’t lose it while fighting Techno and his withers. He definitely wasn’t going to lose his hope now, he needed it.

After all, without hope, every task seems unattainable, life was missing the usual colours, everything seemed grey and dead.

Without hope, there was no point in trying to do anything. Fighting for a nation that was being destroyed by a dictator? Pointless. Trying to save his insane brother? It was too late for that, wasn’t it? Wilbur was a lost cause. All of his friends could say and think that. They could try to demotivate him, but Tommy never lost his hope.

He was still trying, still fighting for what mattered to him the most. Before it was L’manberg, but now? His family was the priority. He would never give up on any of them, the stubbornness was flowing through his veins, just like the courage and creativity in his brothers.

Now, getting through the snow deserts, cost him a lot of his stubbornness. The constant snowing didn’t really help with navigating around the already very snow-covered area. If he wasn’t mistaken, he should be getting close to Techno’s base, but if he had to be honest, everything looked the same to him. Tommy knew if he took even a slightly different turn somewhere, he would freeze to death, probably never to be found, his dead body covered in snow.

Would anyone miss him at all? He doubted that anyone besides Bad would even feel sorry if they found out about him being dead somewhere in the middle of the snow biome. Maybe dad would cry a little after him, but besides those two, there were not many people that cared much about him.  ~~ What about Tubbo? ~~ But he didn’t need their sympathy, he needed to find his older brother before he turned into an icicle.

Tommy wasn’t sure for how much time he had been walking for, but the cold temperature was really getting worse and worse. If he hadn’t drunk the healing potion from Bad (did he seriously have to put a little sticker of him on the bottle?), there was no way that he would get this far into the snow biome. He would either pass out from blood loss or the pain and general exhaustion.

After taking the shockingly sweet potion he felt much better and his wounds were almost healed. He even was able to stand on his previously shot leg! The anger he felt whenever he remembered about the torture was keeping him warm enough for now, but he knew it wasn’t enough for the whole journey. Tommy swore that Dream would pay for everything he had done to him, but now the revenge had to wait.

Thanks to the warm jacket he hadn’t frozen to death yet, but he was still shivering a lot. If he remembered correctly from what his dad told him, it was a good sign. His body was still trying to fight the cold, he had some time left. Tommy knew if he started feeling hot rather than cold it was a very bad sign, but he refused to make even a simple fire. It would bring unnecessary attention to the monsters.

Maybe he got an iron sword, but if there were a bunch of zombies out there somewhere with him alone, he didn’t really want to take a chance with fighting them. He had problems before with beating  _ one _ spider that saw him, he definitely couldn’t take on a bunch of zombies or skeletons in his current condition.

His legs were definitely not used to such distances because it was clear as day that his walking was getting slower and slower. At this rate, he will freeze to death before reaching Techno’s base. He just hoped that Phil didn’t lie about the wooden cabin in the middle of nowhere. They talked about it briefly before his dad told him that he had to leave again, but they never get into any details.

Tommy hoped that they would talk more over breakfast, maybe even make a plan on how to get to Techno, but in the morning his dad was already gone. The last sign of his father’s stay was a note on his desk. It was definitely his dad’s handwriting.

_ Tommy, _

_ I had to leave again without a warning. I know, not the best example of a dad am I? But I hope you will be safe and won’t get into much trouble while I’m gone. I will try to get back as soon as I can, but you know how much time my work takes. I am counting that you know well enough how to take care of yourself by now. _

_ I also know it might be a lot to ask of you after what happened on the 16th, but if there will be any trouble that you can’t solve alone or that your friends can’t help you with, please find your brother. _

_ I’m not exactly sure where in the snow biome he currently lives, but I know if there has to be someone that finds him, it will be you. My most stubborn son that never gives up. No matter how much you may think you hate and despise him, you both need each other more than you think. _

_ Please don’t start giving up at your brother’s expense. _

_ I love you very much, _

_ Dad _

Tommy suspected that Phil didn’t really leave for his work, but he also knew that his dad had to take some time to mourn Wilbur without him, just like Tommy did at Bad’s house. They both needed some time alone, especially after seeing and talking to Wilbur’s ghost. It was just a matter of time before his dad would come back. He  _ always  _ came back.

On the same desk, just next to the note, there was a book with bedtime stories. It was the same book his dad used to read him to sleep. The cover and pages were as shabby and old as he had remembered it. He hesitantly opened the cover, not sure how easy the book was to tear apart, just for him to see another note, but this time much smaller and shorter.

_ You’re still not too old for bedtime stories, _

_ Dad _

It would be a lie if Tomy said that he didn’t tear up a little bit when he saw his dad’s message. The simple gestures, little notes and the warm hugs always reminded Tommy that no matter what, no amount of favouring his older brother or arguments that Tommy took part in, could change the fact that he was, after all, his son, which he very deeply loved.

Tommy felt that even thinking about the hugs that dad gave him was making him feel warmer inside. Even more than being angry at Dream. If Phil believes in him, he definitely can do it. He is capable enough to find Technoblade! He is the most stubborn son his dad has! And he is going to prove it no matter what!

The snow intensified, almost turning into a blizzard. Everything seemed crystally white, Tommy couldn’t even see anymore the trees on the side of his chosen road, not to mention the wind was making him practically deaf to any danger. If something was creeping up on him, there was no way that he would notice it in time to defend himself. He had to find a place to stop before the blizzard turned him into a walking snowman.

He would definitely get lost in this weather. Who knew if he already wasn’t lost, getting further and further into the snow desert. He had to find some sort of a cave, even a ravine would save him. Tommy wasn’t the most religious person in the world, but right now he hoped that if someone or something was out there, looking at their daily struggles, it knew what mercy was. It seemed like something heard his silent pleas because there it was, he saw it in the brief moments when the snow wasn’t blinding him. A big hill, full of ice caves in it. The gaping black holes were the only reason Tommy even saw the mountain in the first place.

The whole thing was probably made out of ice, it wouldn’t be the first one that Tommy saw on his path. He just had to get into one of the bigger caves, hopefully, the one that wasn’t full of monsters. Then he could make a little fire, finally, he will feel the warmth again after such a long time of being in the cold. He just hoped that the fire wouldn’t cause an avalanche that would trap him inside of the mountain.

Finally, after what seemed like forever, the boy stepped into one of the many caves. It seemed that there was nothing inside, at least there were no sounds coming from the deeper parts of the cave, but it was hard to tell if there was no danger at all with the darkness surrounding him.

Tommy took a few more steps into the cave and put his hand onto one of the walls for the support. He feared that he might slip on the iced floor. By the touch of his hand, as if he knew any magic, the dark blue walls flashed with light under his palm. At first, it was a small ray of light blue where his hand touched the ice, but then the whole cave started shining with its own light. It wasn’t as bright and blinding as the snow outside, but it was bright enough for him to see his surroundings. The blue was calming.

Tommy, still in awe at the sight in front of him, was turning around, as if he tried to see every wall and corner of the cave that was radiating all the shades of blue that he could imagine. He never saw something so beautiful, it reminded him a little of the northern lights. Tommy felt like he was in one of the tales that dad had read him.

‘’The blue prince’’ wasn’t his favourite story, but Phil could always narrate it so interestingly, that he couldn’t get bored with it. The title prince also found himself in an ice cave, similar to the real one Tommy was standing in, but he wasn’t alone like the blonde.

~~_ You’re not alone. We are here. _ ~~

He had a younger brother with him, the little one was hungry for adventure, while the older just wanted them to get home safely.

They also got lost in the blizzard and happened to stumble upon a cave, similar to the one Tommy was in, but in the tale, the prince didn’t light up the walls. The prince could hear the walls talking, their screams even warned them about the incoming danger. The real ice walls were just emitting pretty lights, they weren’t talking to Tommy and he didn’t seem to hear the voices from before.

After checking most of the cave, Tommy assumed that it was safe enough for him to stay for a night (as if he really had a choice).

Once again, and probably not the last time in his life, he thanked Bad for being so fond of him, even when he annoyed the demon countless times. In the little bag with engraved BBH on the side, that he had found in the pile of stuff, there was a little bit of raw meat, some bandages, the now empty bottle of healing potion and for what he couldn’t praise that man enough, there was also flint and steel next to the few dry sticks. Without the last two things, he definitely wouldn’t survive the cold arctic night.

The fire was a risk that Tommy was willing to take. He had to get warm and eat something that would warm him up from the inside. He went deep enough into the cave so the cold wind wouldn’t be able to put out the fire, and hopefully, the entire cave system wouldn’t bury him alive.

It was very nice to feel the warmth again, you could say it was almost cozy, even if Tommy was sitting on the cold snow in an ice cave. He was lucky enough to find fragments of stone ground, now the fireplace wouldn’t make a big hole in the iced floor. It also wouldn’t get the sticks wet as if in case of making a fire on literal ice.

The fireplace he made wasn’t the biggest, but it was perfect enough for him to get slightly more warmish and to get his meat roasted. Even without any spices, it smelled delicious. For how long he hasn’t eaten anything, anyway? He really started feeling the emptiness in his stomach. Before now, he was too scared, on too much adrenaline and too exhausted to notice how hungry he was. But now? Oh man, he was starving!

It was really tricky to get the meat out of the fire, but somehow he managed to do it without burning himself. He guessed that everything would taste great after... How much time has passed? Maybe a little more than a day, without any food. It tasted amazing for something that was just simply a slice of meat from the fireplace.

Not only the hunger but also the exhaustion finally started showing off. Tommy was barely able to see anything with his eyelids so heavy as if they were made out of obsidian. He tried getting up to make sure for the last time, if he was in fact, safe in this cave, but he quickly gave up. His whole body was too tired to do anything. He needed rest.

Before he completely drifted off and fell asleep, lying next to his little fire to get as much heat as possible, he could swear that he heard the voices again. He tensed a little, ready for their screams, his time they weren’t screaming at him. It sounded as if they tried to soothe him to sleep with some sort of a lullaby.

needless to say, it was working. Tommy was too tired to focus on the lyrics, but the calm and quiet voices, singing in harmony, made him feel relaxed. Some voices were singing louder than others as if it was their time to shine, but they were quickly shushed by the others.

One voice even sounded similar to Wilbur. It was the loudest one from them all, but not loud enough to stop Tommy from falling asleep on the cold ground. This voice was singing something else from the rest, but this part of the song he was able to understand. He heard it so many times before in his life and maybe he would even react if he wasn’t so tired.

Before his consciousness completely slipped away, he heard once again the voice of his brother, singing to him the verses of what was once their way of expressing freedom. The voice started singing again, but Tommy didn’t hear him now. The boy was asleep, while the calming voice echoed slightly in the cave.

This voice wasn’t in Tommy’s head as the rest of them, but the lyrics could be heard again.

_ Well, I've heard there was a special place... _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, thank you so much for reading!  
> It means a world to see that people enjoy my writing :')


	3. I am my own nightmare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A second ago it was freezing, the temperature was who knows how well below zero, and he was shaking, unable to keep the heat in his own body. But now? The cold was gone, he was no longer trembling and any sign of harsh freezing wind was gone. Was he starting to show the severe signs of hypothermia? No, no, no... He couldn’t die. Not yet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a very long chapter, but I swear that it's worth it  
> (Ah yes, tormenting a child is still so fun lmao)

A second ago it was freezing, the temperature was who knows how well below zero, and he was shaking, unable to keep the heat in his own body. But now? The cold was gone, he was no longer trembling and any sign of harsh freezing wind was gone. Was he starting to show the severe signs of hypothermia? No, no, no... He couldn’t die. Not yet.

Tommy opened his eyes just to see that he was now standing in the middle of his own house. It wasn’t the cave he had gone to sleep in. The blonde looked around quite shocked, but he didn’t feel any different than usual and everything looked normal, just like he left it. Nothing was broken, burned or displaced. Normal, huh.

It wasn’t so uncommon for him to see his house in one piece and yet it was somehow unnerving. The normality of this place was eerie, but maybe, just maybe, it was because of the stiff air that he was breathing in.

**_Your door is a literal hole leading to the outside... Why would air be so stiff in the middle of the Spring?_ **

He ignored the voice, even if deep inside he knew that it was right. The air was too stiff, especially for this season. He almost had problems with breathing. Something was definitely wrong here, Tommy just couldn’t put his finger on what it was. 

The blonde made a few steps towards the open exit of the house before stepping on a pressure plate that was camouflaged well enough that he didn’t notice it. Before Tommy even had a chance to think about who could put it here and why, he heard a sound too familiar for his own liking. The quiet hiss of dynamite being set off made him sprint out of his own house.

He didn’t make it far before the force of the explosion pushed him a few meters further down the prime path.

It took him some time to get out of the shock that his body was in, and even more time had passed before he was able to slowly get up from the ground. His ears were ringing loudly, but he knew that it would pass with time. It wasn’t the first time that TNT was set off too close to him.

With the ears still filled with annoying ringing, he checked himself for any bad injuries, but somehow, besides a few cuts here and there, he was completely fine. The blonde wondered who started the prank war with him this time. It definitely wasn’t his fault, that was for sure. He was too busy rebuilding L’manberg to start another war. ~~Especially one that could include using dynamite.~~

Tommy came up to the house (or whatever was left of it) to look at the damage. Everything above ground was in complete ruins, but he hoped that the underground parts were not completely destroyed. Most of his stuff, excluding the ender chest, was under the remains, but there was no way of checking the internal damage without cleaning up the rubble (which could even take hours of hard physical work, and Tommy wasn’t in the mood for that).

He sighed very loudly before quickly turning around at the sound of another explosion. This time it was in a much bigger distance than the one that took place here, but it still made him jump a little. Tommy wasn’t very fond of dynamite, but whoever was using it seemed to have a time of their life.

He could swear that between the loud bangs there was also a peal of echoing laughter, not too far from where he was standing. Maybe he wasn’t the only person getting pranked?

Or maybe he was just going crazy.

Tommy finally took a proper look around his surroundings. It finally occurred to him what was making him so nervous about this place, that he couldn't seem to notice before - every building around him was almost entirely destroyed. Some were in ruins while in the place of others, were just big craters as a reminder that something was even built there.

A million thoughts went through his mind at the horrific sight of his home. Each worse and more frightening than the other.

And among these thoughts and questions occupying his brain was the most important one of them all:

_Where the fuck is Tubbo?_

The boy didn’t give in so easily to panic but quickly started making his way towards Bad’s house. If somebody had answers to his questions it would be the demon. Tommy just hoped that Bad and the rest of his friends were hidden somewhere safe.

The sounds of explosions could be now heard everywhere. They seemed to be getting closer and closer to Tommy, whenever he tried running away from them. The ringing in ears was now only a not so distant memory, but the boy hoped that it was the reason why he was hearing unnerving human screams coming from who knows which direction.

Even if they were not a fragment of his imagination that his brain made up, Tommy couldn’t make himself go and look for people who definitely needed help. No one making sounds like that had everything under control. He wanted to help, of course he did, but the fear inside him was stronger than the urge to help others.

He didn’t stop.

The volume of screams seemed to increase with every passing minute. Whatever was happening to them, the kid didn’t want to share the same fate as they did.

He fought in multiple battles, but he never heard such horrific shrieks. Yes, of course, in the previous wars you could hear people screaming, soldiers died on the battlefield for multiple times. It was considered normal at wars, but no one ever screamed to this extent.

Who could blame a child for getting scared for their own life when it heard screams that could wake up the dead?

His walking pace was starting to look more like a run no matter how hard he tried to calm down. The screams were making his skin crawl. He couldn’t stand it for much longer. Maybe if they belonged to his friends, he would run and try to help, but none of the voices seemed familiar. Tommy wasn't even sure if the screams were coming from someone, who he could call a friend, or if those were screams of their enemies.

He didn't want to find out which case was true and who was making these people scream.

Something in his gut was telling him that whoever that person was, he should hide from them. It sounded stupid, but better safe than sorry, right?

Halfway Bad’s home he stopped. The screams were now gone, just like the sounds of explosions. It made the whole atmosphere of this place even worse. Tommy considered dead silence even worse than the cacophony of the sounds from before…

He started listening to any sounds, but there was nothing. It looked like the world lost all the sounds that ever existed. When Tommy started wondering if maybe his ears were in worse condition than he had thought, he heard the loudest shriek of them all. A man’s voice sounded agonizing, sending a shiver down Tommy’s spine. 

Before the man completely stopped screaming and the world again lost all sounds, Tommy understood only one word from the unnerving shrieks before the total silence - ‘’run’’.

If Tommy was holding himself back before, he was now definitely running. The panic has fully set in, making the boy only more sensitive to the sounds around him. The screams and explosions came back with even louder volume. Every yell and every blast was only making him run faster and faster, and yet every sound was as close as before as if Tommy was only running in one place, never moving from his spot.

It seemed that nowhere was safe. He wasn’t safe. Everything seemed to be on fire or in complete ruins. He had to hide somewhere where he would be safely hidden, but where? Where could he be possibly safe?

_Who am I even hiding from?_

**_You know too well who it is..._ **

He shook his head trying to get the voice out of his head. Another sound in his head was unnecessary. Before thinking deeper about who he could be even running from, he had to find a safe place to catch his breath and plan his next move before the next explosions would be set off too close for him to get out unscathed.

Something in his gut was still telling him to hide and he was sure as hell that now was the perfect time to listen to his instincts. It didn’t matter at this moment who was his enemy, Tommy just knew that he had to hide before he would get spotted by them. He didn’t want to end up like those screaming people.

Every house he passed by was almost completely destroyed, there were too many craters scattered in the ground to even start counting. It was really hard to recognise some of them, but there was one he could easily tell apart from the rest. Bad’s house.

The mansion also suffered great damage from the dynamite. Most of the walls were entirely collapsed, taking the second floor down to the ground. If it wasn’t for the amount of hours that he had spent around the area, it would be impossible for him to recognize the white building. Now it was just a big pile of rubble, useless...

**_Just like you…_ **

Tommy knew that this little voice in his head was a liar. He was hearing it long before the other voices appeared in his head. This one always lied to him, tried to demotivate him, make him lose his hope. Tommy **hated** that voice, but there was nothing he could do to make it stop. It was always there, like some sort of a curse.

**_You know that I am a part of you, Tommy… You will never lose me and I will never leave your side..._ **

The anger rose within the boy, at the mere thought of how smug the voice sounded, he wished for it to be a way to get rid of it, but now he had to focus on his surroundings. He still wasn’t safe and who knows what or who could linger between the destroyed buildings, waiting to strike him down.

Besides the cacophony of sounds, Tommy was able to hear very loud footsteps behind him, but when he turned around, there was no one there. Was he hallucinating things? Maybe it was just a sound of something collapsing? It wouldn’t really shock him that much, everything was in literal shambles.

The blonde didn’t really want to find out if he just imagined things, or if someone was following him, but the gut was still telling him to hide.

Thankfully, he wasn’t going to ignore it for much longer, because he saw in the distance that one of the few walls of the mansion were not completely destroyed. If he wasn’t mistaken, and his eyes were not pulling any tricks on him, the roof of the room was also intact. It would make for a pretty damn good hideout. He just had to run there and hide for some time.

If he was lucky enough, maybe one of his friends would find him there and took him to the rest of the group. Then he would also get his questions answered, after all, Tommy knew nothing about what happened here.

The last thing that made sense for him was staying at the cold cave somewhere in the middle of the antarctic biome, but there was no way that WEEKS of his life could have been a dream. He wasn’t even laying in a bed when he opened his eyes.

It doesn’t matter, all of this doesn’t matter now! He just has to hide and wait for someone. He could easily do that...right?

But of course, if there was anything else that could go bad, it was probably going to happen to Tommy. The amount of luck he had for the past few days could be described as almost nonexistent, so he was bound to have a few problems along the way in his easy and perfect plan.

He heard an arrow being fired from the crossbow and the sound of it quickly cutting through the air while making its way to him. He tried to see from where it was being shot, but it was flying too fast for him to even catch a glimpse. The bolt missed his head only by centimetres, definitely too close for comfort, before it hit the ground with a loud ‘’thud’’.

He didn’t even think twice before starting sprinting to the spot he saw earlier. More arrows were shot in his direction, but thankfully none of them hit him. Whoever was trying to shoot him was a very bad archer and Tommy hoped that it would stay that way for his whole run to the safety.

When he was close enough to the half-broken room, Tommy launched himself forward just to get more speed and distance between him and the potential shooter. He hit the ground a little harder than expected, but nothing felt like it got broken so he brushed it off, and now he was safely behind the thick walls. The blonde pressed himself against the white quartz ruins as if he was trying to blend in with them.

No arrows could get to him now, no matter how great this archer would get. The walls were too thick for any bolts to make it through. If someone wanted to get to him, they would have to come and fight him themself and Tommy wasn’t going down so easily, at least not without a proper fight.

He was taking very shallow and rasping breaths. Adrenaline was rushing through his veins while his heart was pounding fast and loud enough for him to hear it inside his own head. Because of that, Tommy felt as if another explosion was set off inside of his own head.

It was too loud. Everything was too loud. The screams. The explosions. The voice in his head. Even his own heartbeat was too loud.

_Too loud._

Tommy considered that his head might explode just like the dynamite planted in the ground. He started begging in his head for someone, something, for anyone, to stop it, he had enough. He couldn’t stand more noise, he just wasn’t strong enough to deal with all of this. He was still just a kid.

_Please, someone..._

At first, he didn’t notice it, still too overwhelmed by the situation he found himself in, tears almost leaking from his eyes, but for some reason (maybe some sort of a god heard his silent cries) everything went quiet. It was almost shocking how the world could be this silent. He couldn’t hear the explosions or the screams anymore, his own heart wasn’t giving him a headache and the awful voice was finally gone!

**_He is coming your way..._ **

Okay, the voice might still be here, haunting the thoughts of the teen, but at least Tommy didn’t feel like his head would explode from the cacophony of sounds around him unlike just mere seconds ago.

Tommy would never agree with the voice out loud, but now he could easily hear the approaching footsteps. They were very loud, which wasn’t very shocking considering the fact, that the sounds were now gone and that mysterious someone was making their way on the rubble, which was crunching under their feet with every taken step.

The pace of that person was very slow as if they were trying to be cautious around a scared animal. In some way maybe Tommy was for them nothing more than some animal. And that person could be now on a hunt.

The situation was making Tommy more and more anxious with each passing second. Every step was painfully slow, almost like it was calculated with medical precision. It almost felt like the person hunting him wasn’t even real, no one could be this cautious around an unarmed teenager. Or maybe that no one knew him and knew what they were getting themselves into.

He felt a shiver run down his spine as if his own body was predicting that something bad was about to happen. He carefully changed his position (trying to be as silent as he could with all this rubble under his feet) from being almost merged into the wall to something that would give him a better chance in a fight. He wasn’t going down so easily.

Tommy didn’t even notice that he was now holding his breath. His entire body was tense, ready to fight off the incoming danger. But there was nothing that could prepare him for the next thing he would hear, after what felt like being forever stuck in the dead silence, which was only broken with the approaching footsteps of his enemy.

‘’Tommy?’’

The blonde gasped quietly, finally letting the hot stiff air circulate through his tired lungs.

That voice couldn’t be mistaken with anyone else he knew. It was Tubbo! His best friend was here! Tommy wasn’t alone anymore! From the tone of his voice, Tommy could even safely say that it sounded like Tubbo wasn’t hurt anywhere, just scared.

He was found, just like he was hoping for it to be. Tubbo would get him to the rest of their group and they would fill him in on the gaps in his memory because he would definitely remember that they had a war with somebody.

But wait… if Tubbo was here… it meant that he was uncovered, in the open, an easy target for the enemy...

‘’Tommy? Where are you?!’’, he could hear Tubbo’s rushed and full of fear voice not so far from his hideout.

Why didn’t he try to hide from their attacker? Did he even know about the shooter? Maybe they have gone into hiding hearing another person coming? Or maybe they were safe? Maybe that person simply ran away?

The arrows were not flying in his direction anymore so maybe there was a slight chance… No, no, no, of course not. They were never safe. They could never be safe. War after war, they were always fighting. Even if they managed to establish peace, it never lasted for long. The bloodshed always returned no matter where they went or what they did in hope of preventing it.

It felt like the streams of red hot blood could never be stopped. They always flowed, caused by slaughter, causing another slaughter and so on. The blood flowed in a never-ending cycle, and nothing could change its current. Not the child soldiers, nor the gods themself could end it. They were powerless.

And yet, no matter the price they were going to pay, or the amount of blood that was going to be shed, he and Tubbo were always sticking together. Back to back, they were always protecting each other, and it wasn’t going to change now. He couldn’t let Tubbo get hurt, just because the brunet was looking for him.

It was a risky move, there could be other shooters hidden somewhere, but he had to hide his best friend before he would get himself hurt. He couldn’t stand the mere thought of another of his friends getting injured because of him.

**_He’s not your friend anymore…_ **

The boy hoped that if he concentrated enough on not getting him and Tubbo shot with a rain of arrows, the voice would eventually fade away or simply go silent. It was all he needed at this moment.

He waited another second before jumping out from behind the wall he was hiding behind. He expected to hear the explosions or the swooshing of the arrows, but the only thing that met him was Tubbo. _His_ Tubbo.

Tommy was about to let out some breathy giggles at the sight of his friend being safe and in one piece until he noticed what the other one was holding in his hand. A loaded crossbow.

He immediately stopped in his tracks, eyes shifting from his best friend to the weapon he was holding. It was pointed directly at his heart.

‘’ _T-Tubbo_?’’, Tommy tried moving a little closer to the brunette until he noticed that the one in question only tensed and stiffened his grip on the trigger, ready to shoot him for even one slightly wrong move.

Tommy looked again in Tubbo’s eyes just to see the same, if not bigger, amount of fear in them. He looked like a deer that was blinded by the front lights of the car. Eyes wide with fear focused on every move that Tommy was making. If he wanted to shoot him why would he be so scared? He was the one with the weapon, not Tommy.

**_That’s a good question that you should ask yourself… Why does he want to shoot you, Tommy?_ **

‘’Why did you do it?’’, Tubbo sounded close to crying, his voice was very hoarse.

Before Tommy could even form a sentence in his head, let alone say it out loud, Tubbo started raising his voice. It started shaking more and more with each word spoken.

‘’We finally started rebuilding our nation, but you had to destroy it!’’, the boy in front of him started shouting and waving his hands in every direction, probably from the massive amount of anger he must have felt at the moment. The brunet even almost tossed the crossbow on the ground out of pure frustration. Almost.

‘’You’re just like **_him_ ** , aren’t you? You want to destroy everything we worked so hard on! Maybe you don’t get it yet, but you will end up like just **_him_ **, dead.’’

Tubbo wasn’t holding back his tears anymore, ‘’I don’t want another Wilbur, Tommy’’

The last sentence hit the teenager like a truck. He tried to say something, to deny it, to argue, but he was only able to gasp silently like a fish taken out of the water.

The quiet sobs and hiccups were the only sounds that seemed to exist in the world. Tubbo’s tears continued to fall, not stopping even for a second. With time, they started turning red, it looked like he was crying blood. It made Tommy sick to his stomach, seeing his friend like that. And yet he couldn’t make himself say even the smallest word. Moving to hug, to comfort his friend could end in Tommy being shot ~~again~~.

There was nothing he could do besides talking this out. And yet, he still didn’t say a single word. 

The more he stared at Tubbo, the more unnerving his friend started to look. Every time he took his blue eyes from the brunet and the moment he placed them back, he looked slightly different. This time he wasn’t trying to wipe the tears off his own face anymore, he let them run down on his cheeks. They were leaving bloody streaks anywhere they fell.

In his eyes, on his cheeks, on the dusty ground and grass. Blood was everywhere.

Tubbo raised his head to look straight at Tommy. His face was empty of emotions, no more anger or sadness. It was like looking at a painting, no real emotions, it was just a poor attempt to capture reality and that beautiful spark of life it had. There was nothing left of his friend in whatever shell was standing in front of Tommy.

There was another explosion very close to them. The whole world seemed to shake under the force of the detonated dynamite. Tommy tried keeping his balance with his hands spread, just like a tightrope walker in a circus, it didn’t make much of a difference, but at least he didn’t fall onto the ground. Who knows what would happen then.

The moment everything stopped shaking, he looked over at Tubbo, just to see another change in the appearance of his best friend. Goat horns.

Tubbo now had brown, goat-like horns sticking out from his hair.

A moment ago his friend didn’t have any horns growing out of his head. He almost looked like…like Schlatt. With the suit and brown horns they almost looked like father and son.

Tommy finally found his inner voice and spoke out, ‘’ _What happened to you Tubbo…_ ’’

If he got shocked by how weak he sounded, he didn’t let the other catch on.

‘’You even have the audacity to ask this question?!’’, Tubbo finally let the emotions back on his face, but Tommy wasn’t sure if it was something he should celebrate. Angry Tubbo was a scary sight, but even scarier was his face still covered in blood.

**_‘’You_ ** did **_this_ ** to **_me_ ** , Tommy, **_you_ ** did **_this_ ** to **_us_ **’’, his eyes didn’t have pupils or whites anymore, there was only pure red left. Tubbo’s teeth didn’t look human anymore, they were shaped like fangs of some wild animal. Whatever was standing in front of Tommy couldn’t be considered his friend anymore.

‘’ ** _You’re_** **_nothing more than a_** **_coward,_** that can’t even look into his own face to see what he became!’’, no matter how much the appearance has changed, Tommy still felt like it was Tubbo spitting the hurtful words in his direction. He may not look like his friend, but he still sounded exactly like he remembered it.

‘’Look at yourself, you **_traitor_ **…’’, whatever that thing was, pointed its finger at Tommy. Or rather more like behind his shoulder.

The blonde saw in the corner of his eye a brown coat fluttering as the person walked past him. It was _his_ coat.

‘’ _Wilbur?_ ’’, he quickly turned around expecting to see his older brother, even if deep in his mind he knew that Wilbur was dead for weeks and his ghost didn’t wear the coat anymore.

Tommy froze.

In front of him was standing a definitely alive person, but it wasn’t Wilbur. The blonde hair was covered in dust, blue eyes were dull and looked more like that of a porcelain doll than a living person. The stranger looked tired, he had big bags under his eyes, as if he didn’t sleep for days. The sight of the state in which that man was, gave Tommy a strange feeling of deja vu. He saw someone with this kind of look on their face before.

~~The coat wasn’t the only familiar element about this man after all.~~

The man was smiling sadly at him, the look of nostalgia could be clearly seen on his face. Has he met Tommy before? If so, why didn’t Tommy remember him?

‘’ _Where did you get that coat_?’’, he almost growled at the stranger, it didn’t matter to him if he sounded angry, or just straight-up rude. No one could possibly put their hands onto that coat, he made sure of it. It was hidden in his ender chest, alongside his precious discs and other treasures Tommy held close to his heart.

‘’ **_It belonged to my older brother. It’s sort of like a memento of him_ **’’, the man slowly spoke while also crumpling one of the corners of the coat between his fingers. Tommy could swear that he knew this voice, but he still couldn’t say exactly who the man was.

‘’ _But that’s impossible! It looks exactly like Wilbur’s coat! Even the right sleeve is shorter! It can’t be just some coincidence! It has to be the same coat!_ ’’, the blonde man only smiled reassuringly at the screaming teenager.

‘’ **_Well Tommy, I never said it didn’t belong to Wilbur or that it was a different coat_ **’’, Everything of that man sounded tired, even his voice. What has he gone through to look and sound like that?

Wait… how did this stranger know his name? They definitely had met somewhere, but where and when? The unanswered questions lingered on his lips, which didn’t escape the man’s attention. He probably looked quite shocked by the entire situation.

First, his house getting blown up, the explosions and screams coming from nowhere, then almost getting shot and meeting Tubbo(?), and now this weird man was wearing his dead brother’s coat. Everything today seemed unreal.

‘’ _How… Why… I-I don’t understand…_ ’’, Tommy tried asking, tried getting answers out of this strange person, but whenever he started saying one sentence, more questions tried to leave his mouth at the same time, which didn’t really help him with communicating.

The stranger started laughing. His laugh sounded very soft, almost like giggles of a little kid, it even made Tommy a little calmer. Maybe that man wasn’t bad after all? He even made an effort of relaxing his hunched shoulders a little, but the moment that the man doubled over with laughter, it started sounding more and more chaotic, unsteady.

It stopped being calming, he was now laughing like a madman, ~~just like once Wilbur did~~. 

It was like looking at someone going insane in just a few seconds - from being calm and steady to hearing the uncontrollable and crazy laughter escaping the man’s mouth as if Tommy said the best joke in the entire universe, and maybe if it was the case, he would be proud or happy, but now he was getting only more scared with each passing second.

His behaviour wasn’t normal, even if measured by Tommy’s standards. That itself should be saying something about the scene, which was currently unfolding in front of his very own eyes.

Tommy cautiously looked behind his back to see if Tubbo (or whatever that thing was) still had him as a target, but there was no one else besides him and the blonde stranger.

The kid didn’t really know what to do. Even if he left, where would he go? There was no way of knowing if the rest of his friends were here. And even if they were, Tommy couldn’t be sure if they also wouldn’t try to shoot him on sight. If Tubbo was ready to shoot him, who says the others wouldn’t finish what his best friend tried to do?

He must have really messed something up, didn’t he?

‘’ **_You REALLY don’t have a clue, don’t you?_ **’’, the sudden voice of the man and the lack of his laughter scared Tommy a little. He really got jumpy lately, hasn’t he?

The stranger straightened up while also catching his breath. He looked straight into Tommy’s eyes with an unnerving smile on his face.

‘’ **_That’s truly hilarious if I say so. You even made me cry a little tear_ ** ’’ as if to prove his point the man theatrically wiped away a nonexistent tear from his eye, ’’ **_I haven’t laughed so much since I blew up this shitty place. It was a really refreshing feeling! Thank you, Tommy_ **’’

‘’ _You were the one who blew Dreamlands?! Are you sick to your head?!_ ’’, now Tommy was definitely angry.

But before he could say anything else, the man interrupted with a cold tone of voice that shook Tommy to his core and stopped him from saying another word.

‘’ **_Look at me, Tommy. Do I look familiar to you?_ **’’, the stranger tilted his head a little, as if it was supposed to encourage the kid to connect the facts that were standing in front of him. Tommy wasn’t sure if it was because of fear or pure shock, but he listened and looked at the stranger trying to examine him in some way.

Light blonde hair that didn’t even try looking as if it was brushed, blue eyes that lost all of its colours probably a long time ago. The tired face of someone who had lost everything, and yet the man was smiling. It was now more of a sad rather than crazy smile, but one thing stayed the same - there was no hope left in the man.

He definitely looked familiar, but who could he be? Was he really that scared of the truth about this man that he completely erased him from his memories? Or maybe Tommy just didn’t want to come to terms with the truth. Maybe he just wanted to stay oblivious, but for how long could he do that?

If Tommy’s body could tense more than it already was, it definitely did with the moment the truth finally hit him.

There was no escaping from this. He knew this man his whole life, he saw him every time he looked at their family photos in one of many albums that Phil had. He saw the same blonde hair and blue eyes every time he looked in the goddamn mirror. He was now looking at an older version of himself that had lost everything. What a truly depressing sight for someone at Tommy’s age.

‘’ _You’re me_ ’’, a quiet whisper left his mouth. that wasn’t even a question, it was more like a statement to which both of them knew the answer already.

The sad reflection of the teenager started slowly clapping, little chuckles escaped his mouth as he was just standing there with a smug smile on his face. It was truly infuriating to be made fun of by yourself.

‘’ **_It took you some time to figure it out, but you did it, champ_ **’’, Tommy’s shadow started getting closer and closer to the real Tommy. The kid started backing up, sensing the potential danger. He didn’t want to know what this version of himself was capable of. Maybe He was the one behind those awful screams he heard earlier?

He blew L’manberg, he blew up everything! Who knew what he could do to Tommy if the blonde angered him.

‘’ **_I think that having two Tommy’s would be just too confusing, you can simply call me-_ **’’

‘’ _I think that DepressedInnit suits you, dickhead_ ’’, of course when put in a stressful situation, Tommy is going to turn everything into jokes. That’s part of his coping mechanism.

Both of them stopped in their tracks at the same time. The older had a shocked expression on his face, but he quickly recovered from it.

‘’ **_I forgot how much of an annoying shit I was_ **’’, he said that through clenched teeth as if he was in some pain at the simple thought of his (their?) own past. Or maybe he was just angry with Tommy. Both cases are highly probable at this point, to be honest.

Before Tommy could even react, DepressedInnit fastly lunged at him, which startled the teenager enough for him to lose some of his balance while trying to quickly regain distance between them. The older one took advantage of Tommy’s mistake and swept both of his legs, making him fall to the ground. He then proceeded to stomp onto Tommy’s ribcage with his leg, pinning the kid to the ground in the process.

Tommy, still in shock from the unexpected finding himself on the ground, tried throwing off the leg of his opponent with both hands, but it was a vain effort. He was too weak for throwing off even only a leg of an adult in his current position. His tries succeeded only in pinning him to the ground even harder.

The teenager forcefully exhaled the precious air under the weight of the man’s leg. He was sure that it would leave a big bruise that he would find later. If he even managed to survive to the said ‘’later’’.

The kid looked straight into the torturer’s eyes. He hoped that, despite the position he was in, he could look at least a little intimidating by maintaining eye contact. He wasn’t scared, of course not, Tommy Innit was never scared. He was too big of a man to be scared, it didn’t matter how much his shaking hands were betraying his emotions. He definitely wasn’t scared.

‘’ **_As I was saying before you rudely interrupted me - it would be easier for both of us if you called me Tom, don’t you think?_ ** ’’, Tom slightly turned his head to the side as if he wanted to take a better look at Tommy’s tensed face. ‘’ **_Don’t even try to answer that, it was a rhetorical question_ **’’

The boy bit his tongue from saying any funny remarks to Tom’s face. The man didn’t look like he had a lot of patience that he would want to use to deal with Tommy.

‘’ _What do you want from me?_ ’’, Tommy tried keeping his cool, which wasn’t the easiest task considering his current situation. Also, if you were ever wondering, breathing while somebody is standing on your chest isn’t easy either.

Instead of answering, like a normal person would, Tom only leaned onto his own knee, making the weight on the kid’s chest bigger than before. Tommy grunted from the sudden intense pain and a smaller amount of air that he was able to breathe in, which seemed to only satisfy his oppressor even more than anything else.

Great, he stumbled upon another sadistic fuck.

‘’ **_It’s not about what I want, Tommy. It’s more about who I want you to become_ **’’, he gestured with his hand at the ruins of the buildings surrounding them.

‘’ **_You already did something like that, just on a much smaller scale. Why not take your revenge and make them miserable, just like you are now? Maybe even more!_ ** _’’_ , a quick laugh escaped the man’s lips, but he quickly focused on the kid under him, ‘’ **_I want to see them suffer, and if I want that, it’s probably something you also want, even if you really don’t want to agree with me now_ **’’

The silence that has fallen between the two blondes was almost deafening. The only distinct sound was Tommy’s heavy breathing. The kid still hadn’t said a word.

‘’ **_No matter what you may think of me now, you will end like me, sooner or later. There is no escape for you_ **’’

~~His future self~~ Tom gently cupped Tommy’s cheeks in his hands as if to calm down the younger. Tommy wasn’t sure what to make out of this weird gesture, but the cold touch on his face was unpleasant enough on its own for him to shake his head aggressively to break out from Tom’s touch. His cheeks felt under the cold touch like they were stung by a whole beehive. Not the best feeling in the world.

When his head was free from the freezingly cold hands he finally felt some of his courage coming back to him. It was his time to speak now.

‘’ _You have lied to me about everything throughout my entire life and now you expect me to just simply believe you? You sound like a complete maniac! I would never end up like…_ ’’, he couldn’t bring himself to say the last word no matter how much he tried.

‘’ **_Don’t be scared, say his name. ‘’I would never end up like Wilbur’’, isn’t that what you were going to say?_ **’’, the smile on his face was now definitely cruel more than anything else.

Tommy only whimpered in response to the asked question. He wasn’t in the mood to talk about Wilbur, especially with Him, still standing on his chest.

‘’ **_What was that? I couldn’t really hear it. I guess you have to speak up, Tommy_ **’’, the weight on his chest somehow got only worse than it was before, even if Tom didn’t seem to move a single muscle.

Between taking shallow breaths, he answered to his fucked up in the head clone, ‘’ _I may have trusted Wilbur, but one mentally unstable person is enough for me, fucker. I’m not going to blindly follow in your footsteps just because you say it’s inevitable_ ’’

‘’ **_You may think that now, but everything can change with enough time given_ **’’, Tom’s voice was very calm and maybe it could even be considered as a soothing one if it wasn’t for the message it had carried.

Before another threat directed at him could be said, both of them heard another voice.

‘’ **Leave my brother alone** ’’

Tommy was never more glad to hear Wilbur’s voice than now. Even if his brother sounded like he was on the verge of murdering a certain person that was still pinning him to the ground. It was a relief hearing him here.

But when Tommy turned his head in the direction of Wilbur’s voice his eyes widened with shock. It wasn’t his brother, it wasn’t his mentor, his protector, it was the shell in a yellow sweater that was haunting the ruins of L’manberg. To be fair, the ghost looked pretty pissed off, so maybe there was a chance that Tommy was going to be saved after all? But what could a ghost do in a situation like that?

The answer to this question came immediately as the wraith charged with full speed at Tommy’s oppressor. Every last bit of colour left Tom’s face. He was now white as the snow in the untouched parts of the antarctic deserts. The older blonde took his leg from Tommy’s chest and tried to run in the opposite direction to the incoming ghost, but it was faster than any human could possibly be.

From what Tommy could gather while slowly getting up is that ghosts could run (float?) pretty damn fast. If it wasn’t for the shock and pain that the boy was in, maybe he would even find this scene hilarious. The once so full of himself Tom was now running away from Wilbur’s ghost.

On one hand, the child was perfectly fine with a vision of Tom being ripped to shreds by Wil, but on the other, Tom was still somehow him. He would watch himself die and he had enough traumas without this sight.

There was no way that he could catch up fast enough to Wilbur to help him with defeating Tom, but did the ghost really need his help? It seemed that he had everything under control. The only thing Tommy could do for now is watch as Tom was trying to shoot Wilbur’s ghost with his crossbow. Every bolt went through the wraith as if it was nothing. Maybe it was nothing for him, but both of the blondes were shocked at the new discovery.

_Phil’s hand didn’t go through Wilbur’s shoulder so why do the arrows don’t seem to even slow down when going through him?_

The fact that the arrows did nothing to the ghost didn’t stop the sad reflection from firing shots almost without a break. He wasn’t looking, he probably didn’t even care where they would land or what they could hit.

Tommy shifted uncomfortably in his spot just for an arrow to hit the place where his head was just seconds ago, making the blonde almost jump out of his own skin. The second time this day it was too close for comfort.

Before he was given the chance to curse out loud at Tom, he heard Wilbur’s angry voice that silenced him immediately, even if it wasn’t directed at him.

His brother almost never screamed with such anger in his voice.

‘’ **You can’t hurt me. I’m already dead, but I’m pretty sure that I can hurt you** ’’, the ghost may not look quite the same as alive Wilbur, but the way it…he speaks is definitely like it used to be.

Tom was breathing heavy and rapidly as if he was running for miles.

‘’ **_Maybe I can’t hurt you, but I definitely can hurt him_ **’’, another shot was fired, but this time the arrow hit its target.

Everything went still. The world this time seemed to be frozen, not Tommy.

The teenager looked at his dead brother, not really understanding why he was looking at Tommy like he had seen a ghost as if he wasn’t a literal one.

An unnerving feeling started rising in his chest. Something was very wrong, but what exactly?

Wilbur held out his hands in his direction. They were see-through and even with that Tommy could see that they were clearly shaking, but why? Why was his brother so scared? a second ago he was ready to fight Tom, maybe even murder him, but now? He had never seen Wilbur getting this terrified.

He started getting terrified. His breath got shorter and he felt that breathing was harder than before, even with Tom standing on his chest.

Was this had to do anything with anything that Tom said? What did he say exactly? He couldn’t obviously hurt Wil, but Tommy was also here…he didn’t…he didn’t get shot, right? No, of course, he didn’t. If he looked at his chest right now, there wouldn’t be an arrow sticking out from it, right? Right?

The moment the blonde felt his T-shirt getting wet, the bliss of ignorance and the rest of adrenaline were completely gone. He didn’t get shot that many times in his life, but the bolt was definitely within him. The blood was unmistakably spilling inside.

He had to look, he just had to. Who wouldn’t? He just had to make sure that he wasn’t imagining things, and oh god…

The sight only made him sick, what was he expecting to happen? That there won’t be an arrow and this was just a big joke or a hallucination? Maybe people in L’manerg were right, maybe he was just a stupid child.

He could feel his eyes watering. He took one last glance at Wilbur who was now trying to get to him as fast as he could. But even the ghost was not fast enough. Tommy’s legs buckled under him and his knees met the cold ground covered in rubble.

Breathing hurt, thinking hurt, moving hurt. Everything hurt and there was nothing Tommy could do besides bleeding out internally. He couldn’t even scream. That would hurt too.

While Wilbur was trying to get to his baby brother, Tom was just standing in the same place, smiling and laughing like a maniac.

The last thing that Tommy registered was the pain that was spilling inside him along with the blood and Wilbur screaming his name as he hit the ground quickly losing the rest of his consciousness.

‘’ **_Give it some thought, Tommy_ **’'

* * *

Tommy woke up with a scream that echoed in the cave he was currently in. He started looking around himself in panic, scanning for the potential danger, but there was nothing. In the cave, beside him, were few of his belongings and the dying out fireplace. Nothing more, nothing less. His breaths were really short as if someone was still standing on his chest and putting pressure on it. Or as if his heart was shot with an arrow.

The silence was unnerving. The blonde expected to get attacked any second, by anything, anyone, but no matter how long he had waited, nothing came to hurt him. It wasn’t like he was sad by the fact that nothing was with him here to attack him, but the boy was still very much on edge from the awful nightmare.

When he calmed down enough, that his heart didn’t seem that it was about to explode from fear, he slowly lifted his shirt up, expecting some sort of bruises and a shot wound, but there was nothing. No signs that he was ever fighting with someone. Of course, there was nothing. It was just a nightmare, nothing more. Nothing more…

However, the scars that he actually had, were very old and most of them practically faded away completely. There were no fresh scars, but every one of the old ones had its own story to tell. His first fight, numerous sparring with his older brothers, failed projects that turned against him, the duel with Dream. He fought a lot for a child ~~soldier~~.

Tommy put down his shirt and shivered a little from the sudden cold wind while doing so. He almost forgot where he was, it’s the middle of a snow desert, of course, it would be cold. He wasn’t in his warm and cosy house anymore. He was almost sad for leaving the warm L’manberg grounds from his nightmare. The emphasis on the word ‘’almost’’.

The blonde sighed and put his face into hands. They were awfully cold. ~~Almost like Tom’s hands.~~

He felt even more tired than before going to sleep. Maybe it was the surrounding coldness, but Tommy hoped that it wasn’t the case. Hypothermia wasn’t something that he wanted to joke about. He still wanted to survive long enough to find Technoblade’s home. He _had_ to survive, there was no arguing with that.

When he took his face from the cold hands, Tommy could swear that he saw in a corner of his eye, on one of the walls, a reflection of Wilbur’s yellow sweater, but when he turned his face in that direction there was only his own scared and tired face. It looked distorted by the crooked iced wall.

The feeling of breathlessness still lingered somewhere in his lungs, making him anxious, even though he knew that this cave was safe.

He was definitely going crazy. First, the voices, then this awful nightmare and now he started seeing things. Well, he wasn’t the only one that saw Wilbur’s ghost, but Tommy was pretty sure that the wraith stayed in L’manburg. Why would it even follow him? Tommy was now nothing more than a stranger to Wilbur. It would be weird if it started following him out of the blue.

Tommy decided that sitting in a cold cave wasn’t going to help him anymore because it was probably daytime already. At least it should be. He better get a move on if he wants to find Techno’s base before another night hits him.

Upon deciding that leaving without something that could be called breakfast would be a stupid move in such weather, he ate the rest of the meat that he ~~burned~~ cooked yesterday and gathered his few things into the bag. Tommy stretched himself a little, feeling that the wounds he gathered along the way here, were not in such bad condition as he had thought. He was really glad to have Bad as his friend.

He took a last look at the insides of the cave that gave him shelter before walking in the direction of the tunnel that should take him to the surface. Thankfully it wasn’t completely covered in snow and Tommy managed to dig himself out of it. Everything seemed even whiter than it was last night, if it was even possible.

His eyes hurt every time he looked at the snow around him (which was actually a lot, considering where he was now). Tommy awkwardly started making his way through the massive amount of snow. It wasn’t the easiest thing to do without proper equipment, but somehow he managed to get a grip on how to walk without falling over every two steps he took.

Granting that it was daytime, Tommy expected it to be somewhat hotter than yesterday’s night, not much, but at least a little bit. He still only had some ripped jeans, a T-shirt and jacket to keep him warm. That seriously wasn’t the best fashion choice for this type of weather, but he didn’t have anything else. Unfortunately for him, it was only getting colder and the kid couldn’t help but shiver almost without a break.

The only good thing that Tommy noticed about his situation was that the wind wasn’t so strong as yesterday. The journey would be much worse if there was a sharp wind, he was cold enough without it.

The blonde wasn’t sure for how much time he was walking for, but the pain that occurred in his eyes was definitely getting stronger with the travelled way. Another fun thing that he had to take care of.

Somewhere in the not so distant forest, he heard a bunch of crows starting their singing contest. He only grunted with mild annoyance. His head was hurting enough on its own, he didn’t need another sound that would make the pain only worse than it already was.

Tommy wasn’t sure what would keep his mind occupied for his long walk, but he definitely wasn’t going to think about that awful nightmare. There was no way he would end like Wilbur… No, just no.

He shook his head and heavily sighed. This was going to be a very long and boring journey. If he even managed to survive it.

* * *

Not so deep in the forest, a flock of crows was devouring the rest of the meat that was left on some poor fox body. They were happily and loudly chatting among themselves. Every single one was invested in the meal or chatting, well, every crow beside the oldest one.

He had the most experience, so it was his job to be on a lookout for any danger that could harm the flock. He would get food, either way, so missing this meal didn’t worry him that much.

He was sitting on one of the highest of the tree branches, it gave him a really nice view of the arctic desert.

The only alive thing that he saw in the white space was a human making its way through the snow. A short human. Potentially a child.

The crow knew that a child meant parents and parents meant that there could be a village, and villages meant that they would get more food. The oldest happily could announce to the rest of the flock that more food could be potentially found in the near future. But he didn’t do it.

The blonde hair of the human was too familiar for the oldest crow. He had seen it somewhere before, hadn’t he?

He could easily let go his eyes from the child, it couldn’t hurt them from this distance, but his instincts were telling him that this little human was somehow important.

When it finally occurred to him where he saw the blonde child before, he quickly took off and started flying in one direction, almost the same as the one that the short human was taking. While leaving the forest in a hurry, he scared his flock who also flew into the air, leaving the food for any other animal to find and feast upon.

The human with blonde hair only stared for a second at the flying flock, but they quickly started walking again.

The child wouldn’t survive long in this cold without help from other humans and the oldest crow knew someone who would care for its safety.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, hello! It's me, ya girl! I know that this chapter took a really long time to publish, but I wanted to work more on it so it would be a better reading experience! (hopefully, I managed to do that lmao)
> 
> As always, thank you, everyone, for reading this chapter, getting invested in me tormenting a Minecraft child and simply taking out a time from your day to read all my ramblings. Also don't mind me, but my very real sellout timer just ringed so look! I have a twitter! You can find me @Szparagus
> 
> I will sometimes post sneak peeks about the upcoming chapters or just ramble about headcanons I love, so if you're bored you can check it out lmao


	4. The unbearing cold

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If you asked anyone if Technoblade, The Technoblade feared something, you would always hear in response ‘’no’’. Everyone knew that the Blood God feared nothing. He could slay hundreds, if not thousands of men without breaking a sweat, there was no way that something in this mortal realm could scare him. Techno himself would deny fearing anything, but at this moment his own heart was betraying him by beating faster than normal.

The moment Technoblade opened the heavy wooden door leading to the outside he got hit with cold wind and almost blinding light reflecting off from the snow. If it wasn’t for his piglin eyes, so used to seeing bright lakes and oceans of lava almost without a break, he was sure that he would get a bad headache. Normal humans would, but he definitely wasn’t normal, or human.

The piglin hybrid took a deep breath enjoying the slight pain that came with the freezing cold air circulating through his lungs. It would be a great day and nothing could disrupt the peace and quiet that he managed to earn for himself in this cold desert.

He couldn’t stand on his front porch for the whole day though, sadly, he had some things that had to be done. They were not going to finish (or start, in most cases) themselves so Techno had to take the matters into his own hands. He closed the door, not letting the cold wind inside of the warm wooden cabin and started walking down the stairs.

His movements were quick and within seconds he stood in the stables, ready to prepare Carl for another ride in the cold weather. The horse still wasn’t used to this new environment, but Techno was almost in desperate need of meat and there was no way that he could neglect this awful and tiring chore for much longer. He had to go for a hunt and restock his storage definitely sooner than later.

_Carl! There is Carl! Hi Carl! Hi!_

_Family! He’s a family!_

_Horse horse horse horse horse horse horse horse_

_Technokeeper! Technokeeper!_

The piglin only huffed at the voices talking loudly in his head. Sometimes he felt as if he had an entire kindergarten inside of his brain and not a curse that demanded blood, but after almost his entire life filled with the voices, he was entirely used to them and their ways of talking.

Carl was excited at the sight of the piglin hybrid because every time he visited the stables there was a 99% change for the horse of getting a tasty treat and fresh stack of hay. This time wasn’t much different. The only change was that when the animal was busy with filling its stomach, Techno was busy putting a warm red blanket, a saddle and finally a light armour on its back. Carl didn’t even take a glance in his direction throughout the entire process of making sure that he would be warm and safe.

The horse trusted him absolutely, even if at first Techno cared only for its endurance and speed, now he found himself attached to it. It wasn’t as fun as having a dog or a cat and he couldn’t really let Carl inside of the house to have some company, but there was something about the horse that made Techno want to protect it.

When the man was satisfied with how the horse was equipped, he took the reins in his hand and walked outside, leaving the warm building behind them. Without making even a slight sound that would suggest annoyance, he simply wrapped his red cloak more tightly around himself to stop the freezing wind from taking his body heat. The bright colours were not an issue, but as a piglin, he was more vulnerable to cold weather than the others from his family.

On very cold and windy days like this Techno wondered why he had chosen to settle down in the middle of nowhere in the snow biome when he could easily live in the nether without care for this world. And yet here he was, riding the horse in the snow while trying to spot an animal bigger than a rabbit. A bear would be pretty good, but lately, there were less and less of those in the area. Was it Techno’s fault? Maybe, but he was making sure to never hunt a mother with cubs. An unwritten rule of his.

Maybe it was just a simple migration that the man had yet to get used to. He wasn’t living that long here, after all, only a few weeks, a month tops. He still didn’t see a lot of things that were normal for animals in this type of environment. But if he was patient enough, there was a chance of getting a good amount of meat that could last him for another week, or even more, if he rationed it properly.

Carl was keeping the steady pace until both of them were in the middle of a forest, slowly making their way through sparsely spaced trees. This biome had its own perks - Techno could easily ride Carl in most of the forest which only made his hunt easier. Back in L’manberg, the woods were too thick for the piglin to be able to go on the horse for the meat or to farm for better equipment. It was infuriating.

After a quiet few minutes of the steppe, Techno found a decent sized clearing that wasn’t fully covered in snow. The grass was a rare sight, but if there was grass, there would also be herbivores hungry for it. A perfect spot in the shadow of a thick spruce tree was making the piglin hard to spot, even for a human eye it would be a hard task.

Now, the only thing he had to do was wait.

When Techno was younger, he would get bored easily while waiting for an animal to leave their burrow. There weren't a lot of things that could keep him in one place, or pull him away from doing something. There wasn’t anything in between, he either was everywhere or nowhere. It often drove Phil crazy when he couldn’t find Techno, sometimes for a whole day even, but with time, both of them got used to his changing behaviour.

But he wasn’t a little kid anymore and the time that he had spent on waiting was used to thinking about the next objectives on his to-do list. Sooner or later it was bound that someone would come for his head and Techno had to be prepared for that day. There was no way that after he let the withers roam the pathetic ruins of L’manburg while killing everyone on sight, no one would show up demanding his blood or head. For them, Techno was the real traitor, just like...Wilbur...

No, he wasn’t going to think about his fucked up family. He had bigger matters on his head right now - he should finally build a nether portal for easier access to netherite, mining emeralds were also on his list because his supply wasn’t infinite and at some point, he wouldn’t have any left for trading. Maybe at some point, he would even make a potato farm, just for old times sake.

The rest of his mental planning was interrupted by a deer herd that was oblivious of the Blood God silently sitting on the horse in the shadows of the forest. His red eyes were the only part of his body that moved, stalking the walking prey.

He just had to wait for a good moment to strike as many of them as he could and as fast as he could. The herd was mostly composed of males so it wouldn’t be like Techno was taking away their last line of defence from the predators. A few males here or there, it wouldn’t matter much to the herd, but it was crucial for the piglin.

_Blood for the Blood God! Blood for the Blood God! Blood for the Blood God!_

_Kill the whole herd! Kill everything that moves! End them! End them all!_

_Leave them be! They did nothing to you! Stop it! Stop your hunt!_

_Spill the blood, pig_

Techno slowly and silently took out his crossbow, loaded it with an arrow and aimed at one of the further deer, which was busy trying to find some grass that wasn’t completely covered in snow. He didn’t let the bloodthirst voices take control over him, not this time. He needed the meat and their impatience could only ruin his plans of getting his future meal.

One of the ‘’perks’’ he had as the Blood God was the ability to sense and hear the heart of every living thing that had one to begin with. If he concentrated enough he could also see the exact place of heart and every vein filled with hot red blood. It made the whole process of hunting so much easier, after all, nothing could survive an arrow shot right in the heart. At least not for very long.

If it wasn’t easy enough to spot the brown masses of fur in the white snow, the red hearts pumping blood made it even easier. Techno could hear the fast beating of deer hearts, a few birds were resting in the trees and somewhere in the bushes, there was a whole hidden family of bunnies. The only steady heartbeat was Carl’s, there was no nervousness in the mount, which was used to the bloodshed that his rider often started.

The piglin steadied his grip on the trigger, ready to take the deadly shot. Everything would go without problems if Techno hadn’t heard a heartbeat that was moving very fast in his direction. Whoever tried to jump him was trying to do it fast.

His muscles tensed unconsciously. He wasn’t nervous, of course not, he was the great Technoblade! The Blood God himself! He never dies and this time would be no different.

The heartbeat was getting louder with each passing second, suggesting that whoever was trying to attack him, was getting closer and closer. The piglin took a deep but silent breath to calm down his racing heart. With the slow exhale his body relaxed again and his heart slowed down, no longer sped up with panic.

There was no way that Techno would get backstabbed this easily, he was called the Blood God for a reason. He was the one spilling blood, not the other way around. No one could surprise attack him, their heart would always betray their hideout. With his hybrid speed, he turned around too fast for any human to be able to stab him and the arrow was shot in the direction he heard the incoming heartbeat.

A small black blurry shape nimbly avoided the arrow shot in its direction. It quickly flew past him and tried turning back to the piglin. Techno was in the middle of pulling another bolt from his inventory when he recognised his attacker and stopped the process of reloading.

_Géros._

The old crow was now circling above the piglin and Carl, croaking loudly without a break. The deer horde was long gone, startled with the commotion that Techno and the bird made. Even if he made Carl gallop with full speed there was a very little chance of hunting down a single deer, not to mention more than one.

‘’This better be important. Don’t forget that you can also end up as my meal’’, the piglin spoke with his monotonous voice to the still circling crow.

Géros would now normally fly down and sit on the side of the saddle or Techno’s shoulder, but he was still croaking as if his own life depended on it. This was unusual behaviour, he only did that when something was very wrong.

Something inside Technoblade tensed with the incoming waves of anxiety. The last time Géros warned him like that, Techno almost paid the highest price for ignoring his loud warnings. He wasn’t going to make that mistake again.

The crow looked down with his shiny black orbs to see if he finally got the man’s attention. When it was clear that the piglin wasn’t trying to shoot him anymore, but was looking at his movements with ~~fear~~ worry in his red eyes, he started flying in a single direction. He didn’t need to look behind him to know that Techno was following on Carl at a steady pace.

Both of them learned that they can trust each other the hard way.

The man in the cape just wondered what could have happened for the crow to be this impatient, it risked its life to get his attention so it had to be important. The anxiety only grew in him and the fact that the voices were whispering more to themselves, rather than to Techno, wasn’t calming down his nerves either. They also could sense that something was wrong, but all of them, including the piglin, had yet to see what made Géros act this way.

Whatever it was, it couldn’t be good.

This journey would definitely make his naturally pink hair turn grey with rapid speed and Phil would only laugh and ask without end who was ‘’the old man’’ now. Maybe in the future Techno would also laugh at his comments, but right now he could only worry about whatever was awaiting him.

He wasn’t scared, of course, he wasn’t. He was just worried, that’s all.

If you asked anyone if Technoblade, _The_ Technoblade feared something, you would always hear in response ‘’no’’. Everyone knew that the Blood God feared nothing. He could slay hundreds, if not thousands of men without breaking a sweat, there was no way that something in this mortal realm could scare him. Techno himself would deny fearing anything, but at this moment his own heart was betraying him by beating faster than normal.

The piglin was just glad that no one could hear his racing pulse.

* * *

Tommy’s luck was nonexistent in the past few days, the universe was kicking him around from one problem to another as if checking if he could stand all the torment it had planned for him.

He couldn’t.

The blonde wasn’t even sure when he hit the snow or how long he was lying in it, but he had no energy to even try to think about getting up. He was so tired and the snow was so soft, almost like a nice cold pillow.

Maybe if he closed his eyes just for a moment...just for a little bit…

_I’m so tired..._

Maybe he would feel better after a quick nap…

_Only for a minute…_

His eyelids were really heavy, his whole body was sore from all the walking and the rest things he went through earlier. Tommy just wanted some rest, but even this couldn’t be given to him as he heard a slow moan not too far from him.

It did not sound like something alive, but skeletons were always so quiet, only rattling bones could be sometimes heard. But it wasn’t that. They didn’t even have any vocal cords to moan. It had to be a zombie.

But it didn’t make any sense, it was clearly daytime. This walking corpse should be burned as soon as the sun began to rise. Maybe the thick clouds in the sky were blocking the sunlight enough for monsters to also hunt during the day? If it was the case, Tommy was really lucky. A rare sight indeed.

_Another reason to hate this place, I guess_

The moans were only getting closer and closer. Slowly, yes, but Tommy wasn’t in the best condition to fight a sheep, not mentioning a whole-ass zombie. The feeling of tiredness and sleepiness still lingered in his mind, but the loud footsteps on the snow kept him awake enough to look around and find his weapon.

His iron sword was lying right next to his hand. If only he could reach it, then he would have some chance against the incoming zombie. Unfortunately, his own body was betraying him and not a single limb wanted to cooperate with him. Even his own fingers weren’t moving no matter how much Tommy tried to get them to move.

This situation was bad, very bad.

He was going to die here, alone in the middle of nowhere, maybe he would be turned into a zombie, because why not. Another fun kick in the butt from the universe. At this point, everything bad could happen to him and it wouldn’t even be surprising.

If the blonde somehow managed to survive the rotting corpse and find his brother’s base, Tommy wouldn’t be shocked if Technoblade would chop off his head for finding his base. The universe really hated him lately, huh?

Now, the rotting corpse was clearly in Tommy’s vision. It was sickly blue and not green. An unusual sight for the boy, as every other zombie he had encountered was in some shade of green or brown. The thing lost its eyes long ago, now two black gaping holes seemed to suck the breath out of the blonde.

He’s definitely going to die. Oh, gods.

Still unable to move a single muscle, he could only watch as his future cause of death was getting closer and closer. His vision was getting more blurry than he thought earlier, it was hard to tell when the only thing you’re really seeing is the snow. But now it was clear that Tommy’s eyesight was fucked up.

The living corpse was made up of blurry shapes and the only sure thing that the blonde could recognize were the empty eye sockets. His own eyes were also giving up.

Even if Tommy wanted to cry, he wasn’t sure if he even had enough water in him to do so.

Gods, how long has passed since he had something to drink? There was a lot of snow, which technically was water, but he was cold enough without eating it.

The blue corpse definitely saw him, who knows how it did without the eyes, but it fell onto its knees and started slowly crawling to him. The two black gaping holes were getting closer and closer. There was no way that he would survive this, he would need a literal miracle to get out of this situation.

But there wasn’t enough luck in this world to save the blonde. Not this time.

Tommy could only panic internally, his body didn’t even have enough energy for him to start panicking for real. Everything in him seemed to be frozen or in the process of freezing. Even his breath was somehow steady in such a near-death situation.

Every passing second felt like a whole year, his inevitable demise was crawling to him and Tommy could only watch helplessly. Everything was silent, there was no wind, no birds were singing, there was nothing. The whole world seemed to stop and watch breathlessly Tommy’s tragedy. The only existing sound was the crunching of the snow under every step taken by the corpse.

After what felt like forever, the awful stench of a rotten corpse hit him in the nose as the face of a zombie was only centimetres away from his own. The corpse was getting ready to bite off half of his face and Tommy could only beg any existing gods to let him die quickly.

The blonde could swear that the moment the zombie opened its mouth fully to bite into his face, he felt enormous wings brushing his arms, shoulder and back. It almost felt like Phil’s wings when he hugged him on a bad day. Almost. These wings were not comforting him at all. They felt wrong, almost scary.

When Tommy was getting ready to close his eyes (he just wanted everything to end at this point), an arrow pierced right through the empty eye socket and before the zombie could react, it had fallen onto the snow, right next to Tommy.

The blonde was now facing the blue corpse, the black void that was replacing the eyes was staring deep into his soul. The arrowhead was too close to his own eye, but there was nothing he could do about this. His body was still protesting to move even a slight bit. He couldn’t even turn his head to see who saved him.

The restlessness that Tommy felt with each step that was taken in his direction was unbearable. Who and why would help a freezing to death kid? There was no reward, he was broke with practically nothing on him. He doubted that the stranger would be happy from an old iron sword or a worn-out jacket.

The moment the stranger put their hand on his shoulder, he felt as if someone poured lava on it. He wanted to scream in pain, to beg for him to stop touching him, but no sounds escaped his mouth. His cold body was in pain at the mere touch of someone with a higher temperature than him.

The stranger put their face in Tommy’s view of sight, but his vision was too blurred to identify the person. He wasn’t even sure what colours he saw. Everything was mixing together, making an unreadable figure of shapes and colours.

The blonde heard something, a deep but calm voice was directed at him, but Tommy couldn’t understand a single word that was said to him. He wasn’t even sure if the used language was English, to begin with. That person was probably trying to see if he could even be saved.

A wave of anxiety formed inside of him at the thought of the stranger leaving him here to die. He wanted to cry, to scream that he was alive, that he could still be saved. He begged every cell in his body to move, to do something, but there was nothing. No reaction.

Tommy felt his eyes stinging with unshed tears as his body stopped reacting to the burning hot hand on his shoulder. He wasn’t sure if it was because the stranger took their hands away or if his body completely gave up on maintaining the work of his nerves. His eyelids felt heavy again, and this time the blonde didn’t have the energy to even try keeping his eyes open.

He didn’t want to die, not yet. He was still a kid, he wasn’t even 17.

There was so much that Tommy wanted to see, to explore. He wanted to spend more time with his family, with friends he made, but it seemed that his wishes would never be granted as he heard the person getting up and walking away.

His mind started getting hazier and hazier. Making coherent thoughts was getting harder with each passing second? Minute? He wasn’t even sure how much time was passing.

The only thing he felt before his mind completely shut down was a nice warm feeling that seemed to embrace his whole body. It wasn’t unpleasantly hot as the hand from before, it wasn’t burning him.

If it was how people felt when they were dying, maybe it wouldn’t be that bad in the end.

It almost felt like he was lying in a soft bed, tucked in with many layers of blankets. Phil would always tuck him in like that whenever he was sick. It allowed Tommy to finally feel like he was safe. He could finally rest without anyone or anything disturbing him.

* * *

Hours have passed since Tommy’s body temperature got back to somewhat being normal, at least for human standards, but Techno was still sitting beside the bed. The nervousness hadn’t left him even for a second from the moment he found the boy lying in the snow. He couldn’t calm down, not when ~~his little brother~~ Tommy was still at risk of dying from hypothermia.

Yes, now when he was carefully covered in multiple layers of blankets and in warm and thick clothes, the risk was definitely smaller, but if life taught Techno anything, it would be to never take anything for granted. He could be okay for now, but what if the second the piglin left the room, his state would worsen? He didn’t even want to think about this possibility.

_Technosoft Technosoft Technosoft Technosoft_

_The kid is going to die, just take a look at him_

_Kill him kill him kill him kill him kill him kill him kill him kill him_

_HE’S A TRAITOR HE BETRAYED YOU_

_HE’S JUST A CHILD_

_Blood for the Blood God blood for the Blood God blood for the Blood God_

_He’s part of your family_

The piglin sighed in annoyance at the bickering and arguments that played in his head. The voices were calm and almost silent when he was taking Tommy from the snow and to his arms, but the moment he put the kid in bed, the internal war broke out.

Techno wasn’t prepared for the piercing noise of the voices. He had to step back and sit in a chair to avoid falling to the floor from the pure shock he suffered at that moment. That was unexpected to say at least.

He had to tighten his grip on the armrests to keep from falling off the chair. Somehow he managed to not pass out on the spot and steady his rapid breathing. Thankfully the blonde remained unconscious while Techno was fighting with his own body.

A long time has passed since the conflict was serious enough for him to get a proper headache. He should have taken something for the growing pain, but again, he didn’t want to leave Tommy alone. Techno knew that he could endure such small discomfort. After all, it wasn't like his leg was being cut off, it was just a headache. Nothing he wouldn’t survive in the long run.

He wasn’t going to risk the life of the teen that was now softly mumbling in his sleep. Maybe Techno couldn’t understand the words (were they even words, to begin with?), but it reminded him of the time when Tommy was a much smaller kid than he was now.

Neither he nor Phil knew what to do with this little gremlin child that Wilbur brought into their house one day, but they were not going to just throw him out like some sort of trash (at least Phil wasn’t going to do that). The whole time they talked with each other, the blonde was standing behind Wilbur and giving them dirty looks. He looked ready to bolt through the door if they even moved or gestured a little faster than normal or tried to get close to him.

Before Phil could react properly (Techno wasn’t even sure what reaction could be considered proper in this kind of a situation), Wil explained to them how he found the kid trying to steal his wallet and the best idea that he had thought of after he caught the blonde red-handed? Bring the little thief to their house.

The piglin scanned the kid from top to bottom. It was clear that he was homeless and living on the streets - Techno never saw someone so skinny, bruised and dirty in his entire life. It was a devastating sight even for someone like him, who normally wouldn’t care about strangers.

Somehow Wilbur managed to convince Phil for the kid to stay with them for dinner. The meal was more than awkward to say at least. The blonde wouldn’t talk at all to either of them, only nod for yes or no when asked a question (they managed to establish that he had no parents, no home and no siblings that could take care of him).

The kid devoured his food greedily as if they were to take it from him at any moment. Phil was constantly exchanging worried glances with Wilbur and Techno while they were all sitting at the table. Every attempt at making a small talk with the kid has failed, nothing made him talk or laugh. He only sat and ate while being visibly tense.

After dinner, they all went to the living room. Everyone sat on the sofa and chairs in front of the fireplace but the blonde wouldn’t let anyone get close to him. He sat on the closest chair to the front door, which was also the furthest one to them and still looked ready to run away at any second.

It was Wilbur’s time to talk to the kid. It didn't seem like he said something different than Phil or Techno, but finally, they got him to talk, even if it was for a little bit. For such a little boy, he swore a lot, much to Phil’s displeasure.

The boy didn’t want to say his name (it wasn’t very shocking, after all, they were all strangers to him) or where he was living. But when Wilbur asked if he wanted to sleep in their house for a night because the temperatures were going to drastically drop, he hesitantly agreed to stay. It was clear that he still didn’t trust them, Hell, why would he? He knew them for a total of a few hours.

Wilbur decided to sleep on the couch and thus give the boy his bed for the night. The blonde was unsure and very suspicious of their kindness, but he wasn’t going to throw away a chance of getting to sleep in a warm house on a comfy bed.

Techno might have been even more distrustful than the boy that night. He really didn’t like when other people touched his stuff (he supposed that it was because of his piglin genes) and he was sure that this street rat would try to steal something and run away in the middle of the night. That’s why Techno stayed awake for the whole time, ready to catch the blonde leaving with half of their stuff but something like that never happened.

The piglin was listening to the heartbeats in the house - Phil’s was like a big drum, loud but somehow comforting, Wil’s was slow and quiet like a guitar he often played, while the kid’s heart was beating loudly and very fast. Definitely too fast for someone who should be asleep in the middle of the night.

Techno was a very curious hybrid so he left his own room and silently walked over to Wilbur’s. The small heartbeat seemed even louder and faster when the teen was standing in front of the closed door. The rhythm of the small heart sounded too familiar whenever Wilbur was having a nightmare. He wasn’t going to knock and ask to come in, maybe even waking up the kid in the process, just to comfort him. It wasn’t his place to do that.

The next thing that Techno registered doing was waking Wilbur up and standing in the middle of the living room, looking at his adoptive brother vanishing in his room.

The smallest heart was definitely beating faster than before, the brunette’s heartbeat also started beating quicker than usual, but it wasn’t a concerning pace so Techno stood in the same spot. Whatever Wilbur said to the kid worked out in the end because both hearts started beating steadily.

When the brunette hadn't left the room for quite a while and it didn’t seem that anything was wrong, Techno assumed that both of them were asleep and went to lie in his own bed. For the rest of the night, every heartbeat in the house was calm just like they were supposed to.

The piglin wasn't sure when he fell asleep himself but he wasn't woken up by screams in his head or any racket in the house, but by Phil gently knocking on his door and asking if he was coming for breakfast.

Techno expected that the blonde was long gone, but there he was, sitting at the table and eating an ungodly amount of scrambled eggs while lively talking with Wilbur. But the moment he saw the piglin walking into the kitchen there was an awkward silence on his part.

Was he really that scary that the kid felt the need to shut up just upon seeing him?

Sure, he was a hybrid of a naturally aggressive race but it’s not like he’s going to attack the kid if he even looks at him the wrong way. Technoblade decided to simply ignore the kid and hope that he will be gone soon. He still wasn’t sure if everything was in its original place and not in the kid’s pockets.

Phil would definitely deal with that street rat if something was missing. The avian also wasn’t a big fan of his things going MIA so the piglin wasn’t worried about constantly observing the boy.

His adoptive dad took him silently to the side of the kitchen and whenever Phil did something like that, trying to be secretive and shit, it always meant he had big news to share with him. Soft whispers and slow talking a little further from other people - it was his way of trying not to overload his son with information.

Techno wished that he could say he was shocked when he heard Phil’s decision to keep the boy with them, but both he and Wilbur were adopted by the blonde man. The kid would be just another addition to their already weird family.

An avian father, a piglin boy and two human sons. Your stereotypical family in the suburbs, right?

After some time, when Tommy finally felt safe living with complete strangers, they learned his name (Wilbur was the first one to hear it while Techno was the last). The kid wasn’t shy like they thought in the beginning, he was a literal gremlin just like Techno assumed upon seeing him for the first time - it seemed that he was everywhere and would never shut up after he started talking.

Tommy was scared of Technoblade for a long time but they managed to bond over a lot of hobbies and opinions they shared (sadly, Phil forbade Techno from teaching Tommy how to successfully kill his opponent in a battle) which surprised the rest of their family.

The blonde was still more clingy to Wilbur than to him and Phil but it was probably because of the fact that it was the brunette who took him home after catching him trying to steal his wallet. A normal person would beat the living shit out of a street rat like Tommy, but thankfully Wilbur didn’t belong to people that could be considered normal and now they had a little brother.

You would never hear it directly from Technoblade, but he was very happy about Phil’s decision. Tommy’s presence in their daily life somehow made their family bonds even stronger than they were before. The piglin was really glad for this little gremlin child even if he often got under Techno’s skin.

And now after many years of living under one roof, full of arguments, sad and happy memories they shared together, he could only stare at Tommy’s pale face and do nothing. The only thing that Techno could do now is to wait for the boy’s body to start keeping warm on its own.

The fact that it wasn’t the fastest process in the world made Techno’s blood boil with anger, and under it, there was a clear worry in his heart. He didn’t want to also lose his younger brother. Too little time has passed since the previous loss and the piglin wasn’t ready for another one this soon.

The blonde was almost as white as the snow outside the cabin in comparison to the red, blue and green blankets around him. The sight made Techno shiver. He wasn’t sure if it was because he was also getting cold or if it was his body finally reacting properly to the stressful situation.

Carrying Tommy’s unconscious and freezing cold body while galloping on a horse wasn’t the most calming situation the piglin could find himself in. But now the kid was safe in his house and Techno would make sure after he woke up to check his injuries. There was no way that he wasn’t hurt while travelling all the way here all alone with such shitty equipment. But that could wait. The most important thing was for Tommy to regain his body heat.

With every deep breath the kid took, the piglin allowed himself to relax his tensed muscles. Maybe after another few quiet hours, he would even leave his own bedroom for a few minutes to make some tea or eat a snack, but for now, he stayed in his chair with arms crossed on the chest.

Maybe those were his brotherly instincts taking over him, but something made Techno reach out his hand and gently ruffle blonde hair on Tommy’s head. The kid started mumbling again, but he looked peaceful enough for Techno to not stop.

a soft mumble made Techno stop all his movement.

‘’Dad…’’

He couldn’t be mad at Tommy for missing their dad, especially when he was just mumbling in his sleep, but that single word stung his insides for some reason unknown to Techno.

The piglin sighed deeply and took away his hand. It seemed like this night would painfully drag on for him. He decided to close his eyes just for a moment, it wasn’t like he was going to fall asleep in the chair. If that happened, the morning ‘’him’’ would curse his past self for the sore neck, but he wasn’t going to fall asleep. Of course not.

In the end, Géros could clearly see through the glass window that both boys were sleeping peacefully in the same room.

The old crow was just glad that he managed to find Techno in time. This day would end terribly if he couldn’t find the piglin or if Carl was too tired to quickly get them both to the warm cabin.

Now, Géros could also rest without worrying about these two. He knew that they would be safe in the cabin, so he flew to the stables through an overlooked hole in the roof and landed in a big pile of hay on the ground. Carl was long asleep and didn’t even react to his new roommate.

He still was wearing the blanket, saddle and armour that Techno put on him in the morning but it didn’t seem to be a problem for the horse. Géros was put to sleep by listening to the cold wind hitting the wooden buildings. No matter how hard the bitterness was trying to get inside, it wouldn’t freeze anyone sleeping in the stable or the cabin.

Despite the highly stressful situation that took place this morning, it could be considered one of the few rare peaceful days in the middle of an antarctic desert. Hopefully, it wasn’t the calm before a storm.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, hello, hello! Long time no read, huh?  
> I know that I rarely post but I can only blame it on school and my upcoming finals (anxiety gang rise up lmao).  
> As always, I'm glad that you took your time of the day to read my little silly words!  
> Hopefully, the next chapter won't take that long but only time will tell.
> 
> Shameless self-promo time! Yay!  
> You can easily find me on Tumblr under Szparagi2002 and on Twitter under Szparagus!
> 
> Until next time!

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading!  
> It would mean a lot to me if you left me a comment with your opinion on what I can improve in the future! :)


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